See light. Journey of Healing: Day 19

Copyright Tam Black 2013 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2013
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

I rest in calming Light. Light inhabits my mind, surrounds every thought, and radiates out to All. All radiates Light. Everywhere is Light. I am Light.

For today’s Guiding Thought, I really tried to use it as a practice for about 12 hours. For every thought I had, I tried to visualize light surrounding it, then radiating from it out to All. Then I visualized “All” radiating light, and everything being light, including myself. It was hard! I cannot at all say that I succeeded, but the attempt was very interesting.

Thinking about light surrounding certain thoughts makes sense. If I am thinking about a loved one, or a friend I haven’t seen in a while, light around those thoughts feels very natural and easy. My mind flows with those loving caring thoughts, and the light seems to come of its own accord.

But I had committed (to at least try) to surround all my thoughts with light. OH MY.  Here is an approximation of how it went:

The wind is blowing really hard, I haven’t put plastic on enough of the windows; I can feel a draft (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

It’s a little odd to have something as insignificant as plastic on windows surrounded by light…  (Surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

But I said I would do it so… (Surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

Do I need to run to the store to get plastic? (Surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

I wonder what else I need… (Surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

Maybe I should stop at the grocery store too…

Olive oil, popcorn, oh dammit I forgot to surround the last thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…(surround the last thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

Olive oil, popcorn….wait a minute… if I am surrounding every thought with light then I should surround EVERY thought with light (surround that thought with light (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…), watch it radiate to All (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…), watch all become light (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)

Then it became just this cluster of “surround (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…) that thought (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)with light (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…), watch it radiate (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)to All (surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…), watch all become light(surround that thought with light, watch it radiate to All, watch all become light…)…)

My head was spinning and thoughts of Nietzsche’s infinite regression became almost palpable.

I was only minimally successful in this practice today, perhaps you can see why.

But I think I learned a bigger lesson than trying to keep my mind focused on practicing the Guiding Thought throughout the day. The point became:  stop thinking, just see light, be light.

 

 

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