What is Enlightenment, After All? A Journey of Fulfillment: Day 31

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Everywhere Fulfillment is, I am. Fulfillment is everywhere. Fulfillment is. I am.

We are on the last round! How have you done? I guess it is self-assessment time. How have I done? How am I doing? Quite frankly, at the moment, I want to give up. Phooey with this 40 day thing—I want to be done. What exactly is the point? I am giving myself a pep talk as I write. “You know every drop counts. Every day that you stick with it is a building block upward in the spiral to enlightenment. It doesn’t matter if it’s a tiny drop. That drop says to your little-self, ‘I want more. I am more.’ And with every drop your little self loosens its hold just a little bit and you rise just a little bit.”

If I stop, I lose the momentum, the inertia that I have been building for the past 30 days. But OH, the climb is tedious sometimes. What is the point again? Have I really gained any ground?

That’s actually a good question. Have I gained any ground, and how do I know?

Before I started this journey, I noted, “I don’t want my fulfillment to be contingent on, reliant on, dependent upon some external factor—a situation, another person, a Job, etc. I do want Fulfillment to be. Fully. I want my entire consciousness to Know the Truth of being Fulfilled, of being whole, and therefore encounter every experience or person from an internal knowingness of my own (and everyone’s) total-perfect-completion.”

Now that I am thinking about it (self-assessment is good) and looking at where I began, I think I am doing ok. It just feels like I am slugging along. I definitely have gotten closer to being aware of fulfillment and to understanding what it is. This has happened, I think, just in the past week or so, and would have been impossible without feeling lost the week prior to that. I have been making a lot of connections between Oneness and reaching out to others in equality. But what really do these things have to do with fulfillment? What do Oneness and equality have to do with fulfillment?

This is one reason that I find these journeys so fascinating. Somehow, I am not ready to just dive into fulfillment. There is something I need to learn before I can learn what I came here to learn. So I am learning about Oneness and equality, through the lens of fulfillment. When I have learned these concepts sufficiently, I will be able to approach fulfillment from a new place, with better understanding. These are not linear processes. They are more like building blocks, Lego blocks, Tinker Toys, Lincoln Logs…pie pieces. Each piece interconnects with another. I build different components out of certain pieces, and then fit the components together into a larger structure. But within each individual component can be micro-components of any of the other building blocks.

Copyright Susan Billmaier 2014
Copyright Susan Billmaier 2014

This is a quick rendition of the idea. This will need to be refined as I move forward. Each piece of the “pie” has one primary word that corresponds to each Journey: Healing, Purpose, Wealth, Fulfillment, etc. Each piece is an aspect of the larger Journey of Enlightenment; each aspect expands the consciousness toward enlightenment. While I build my consciousness of Fulfillment, I am also gaining an understanding of the components that comprise fulfillment, like oneness, joy, sharing, equality. I am understanding oneness, joy, sharing, and equality through Fulfillment, and at the same time understanding Fulfillment through oneness, joy, sharing, and equality. Their relationship is reciprocal and interconnected. When I build my consciousness of equality, I will then have a better understanding of how fulfillment supports equality, which also includes the aspects of sharing, oneness, and joy. Have you heard this story ? (A picture is worth a thousand words)

Cartoon originally copyrighted by the artist, G. Renee Guzlas.
Cartoon originally copyrighted by the artist, G. Renee Guzlas.

Think of the elephant as “enlightenment”. Each of the different parts of the elephant corresponds to the “pie pieces” above—fulfillment, equality, love, healing, etc. I am ALL of the blindfolded people, going from spot to spot trying to figure out what the heck it is. Each time I get a different piece, I add that to my total understanding. I go around and around, feeling here, testing there, putting the pieces together, each time with new information… I don’t think the blindfold is too inaccurate, either. What, really, is enlightenment, after all?

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