I allow my physical body to experience itself fully as Light and Love. My physical body embodies Light; I am an expanded body of Light and Sound. I move as Light, perceive as Light, behave as Light—I am everywhere—permeating, expanding, unifying, and healing. All things are possible.
What if everything were neutral? What if every encounter was a blank slate, unmarred by memories or expectations? What if everything was fully Love and Light, equal in Being?
What would that be like? I can’t even imagine. But what if it really were possible? What if living in the fullness of Love and Light really is the reality of Being?
What if all things really were possible? What if I could expand, unify, and heal…in this body, in this life, in some span of time that occurred before bodily death? What if I could know myself as Light and Sound?
Do I believe any of this? None of these Journeys make any sense whatsoever unless on some level I believe what I am saying throughout: that I believe every drop counts, that every thought, action, emotion matters, that we are on a Journey of Freedom, a Journey of Truth, a Journey of Knowing and living our Divine Selves.
There is so little I know or understand! How am I expected to believe when I don’t know or understand; when I cannot see connections, causes, effects; when I do not know my place in life, in the great chain of being; when I don’t know my purpose, or if I even matter?
I am asking myself to believe in the unknown, the unseen, the incomprehensible. I am asking myself to trust there is more to this than I will probably ever understand.
So, do I believe this?
Yeah, I do. Sometimes I can’t believe I believe it. Sometimes I don’t understand what it is I believe (most of the time!) or why. A lot of the time I roll my eyes. Sometimes, I shake my head at myself. You are way too rational and skeptical for this. When I look at other people who have faith, who do “god-talk”, who talk about love and light, I think they must be crazy…and yet, here I am.
Here I am.
There is so much knowledge and information that has been around for eons upon eons that people today have not figured out. There are things mystics seem to understand, something they communicate through poetry (Rumi, Lao Tzu). There are mysteries of life and beyond. Who would I be to question or doubt the unknown, the unknowable, the immense body of information that I simply do not have access to? My little sliver of knowing is nothing in the enormity of what is out there, the ages upon ages of wisdom and learning.
There are so many clues pointing us toward something more, something beyond. Clues have been out there for thousands upon thousands of years. How long have ideas of Prana/Qi/Ki existed? How long has Om existed? How long has it been taught that people can channel said energy, and that it is all around us, surrounding us, and within us? How long have people been teaching that breath connects us to this energy?
I realized as I was writing this, I can’t…not believe. I can’t rely on just what I know to convince me of what reality is. I have to believe there is some wisdom of the ages that I simply do not yet understand, maybe that I don’t yet have access to. I have to believe I can get there, I can follow the clues, I can do the meditations, I can explore and experiment and get closer.
On some level, I can’t believe that I am saying “I can’t…not believe” and I’m rolling my eyes, shaking my head. But when I really look within and think about who I am and what I do Know (which barely scratches the surface)…that’s enough…this is who I am, this is right for me…this is my pursuit, slowly ascending the path of enlightenment and liberation.