Love is unconditional. I choose to be unconditionally devoted to the love which is unconditionally devoted to me. I embrace life in love as my True nature. Connected with All in Love, I stand boldly in my heart-center, unwavering in my dedication to Unity of Life in Love.
I wonder what dedication is? I wonder how I know my level of dedication? How do I know if I am doing enough? How do I know when I am unconditionally devoted? What do I do if my dedication waivers?
These are not questions unique to this day, this Journey. These types of questions follow me like a shadow. I am always wondering what is “enough”, if I am doing “enough”, and how I know.
On the one hand, I tell myself we are Infinite Love, Ultimate Oneness, All that Is, connected with and expressing Infinite Source. Isn’t this what I aspire to?
[Ohhhh…. and there’s the skeptic:
But come on! No one is actually like that.
I love my skeptic, she’s so raw and real.]
On the other hand, we never really live up to that…in a sense, the skeptic is right. The difference is that the skeptic doesn’t see the possibility of achievement, the possibility of evolution and change. She just looks at what she sees and says, “Nope” while I look at Infinite Love and Oneness and say, “Working on it!”
So what do I do? It’s like I am always in the middle between wanting to be enough and knowing that I’m not…at least not yet. I’m always between yearning for something I know is possible with unwavering dedication to achieving it, while sitting here looking at myself and thinking, “That ain’t it, kid, that ain’t it.”
Just a few days ago, I wrote about balance, of finding the center within myself and having the courage to do so. This has been the first lesson so far on this Journey: striving but never feeling good enough for that which I am striving, finding the balance between these within myself. How is it productive, if I am always questioning and countering myself? Where is the balance between these?
The neat thing is an answer has already come. The answer is, “Do the best you can every moment. Just do that…then trust.” And the second part: “If you are not doing your best, or think you are not, forgive yourself and move on.”
Now, just to do it.