Unraveling Healing: Journey of Courage – Day 28

Copyright Tam Black 2015 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2015
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

We allow ourselves to connect with our pure Inner Divine Heart of Oneness We are aware of the expression of the Divine Heart through us, as us. We connect with our heart, and are aware of embodying its pure Love intention for All. We are filled with Joy as we embrace our heart’s Love.

Sharing

I started this Journey not knowing or understanding what courage “should be” about. Then, a wise person reminded me the Journeys reveal themselves. Each day on the Journey unravels something, uncovers something, or connects to something. Each day reveals something hidden, or illuminates an aspect of the Whole. Each day offers a method for changing perspective, for shifting into ideas of a higher vantage point, a higher “nature”. They bring me out of my “I” and into Love and Oneness.

Today I feel like I am unraveling; the Guiding Thought is giving me perspective.

I mentioned a few days ago that I “found” a healing technique called Jharra; for the past week I’ve immersed myself in its healing energy. If you’ve ever done any healing work, you know this can be intense.

Courage today means facing the unraveling necessary for healing, without falling apart! The old must be made new. I must have the courage not only to face the old but also to take responsibility for it, and take responsibility for its transformation.

“I” must change. I must change my “I”.

My “I” has (“lower”, “ego”) wants and needs that it expects others to fill (this is the nature of the “I”, to keep itself immature and irresponsible). When those people don’t do what “I” want them to, my “I” feels overlooked and unloved, and blames the other person (do you see how circuitous this is?) When it blames the other person, it withdraws, thinking, “Why should I give anything if it’s just going to be ignored or overlooked?” and “If giving and not-giving produce the same result, why bother giving?”

But you see, this kind of thinking is rooted in giving to get; it is thinking from the lower-mind, the ego-mind, always wanting something in return. My higher-mind knows better; it knows the giving is the receiving, but my lower-mind is asserting itself. There is tension.

I’m not sure what the first-or root-cause of this thought-pattern is/was, but I know it’s been with me a long time. I’ve seen it, acknowledged it, worked with it but it’s still there, even though it’s weaker and smaller than it was 5 or 10 or 20 years ago.

I think it is on its way to total transformation…or at least to a healthy dose of it. This past week has brought together the conditions for moving it on out…hopefully, anyway. I can feel it fighting. It doesn’t want to go; “I” don’t want it to go.

One of the energies I’ve been working with over the past week is that of the Protector-Healer: Anubis in the Egyptian, and Kalbairav in the Hindu/Vedic. I think it is this energy of protection from my lower-self, protection from my own shadows that is very key in these conditions of release. Not only am I able to heal, I am assured of safety as I do so. (It feels neither safe nor healing to “me”, though. Did I mention there is tension?)

Today is bringing up a lot of connections to other Journeys:

A Journey of the Heart: It takes courage to follow the heart, and do the healing necessary for it to emerge in Love

A Journey of Healing: is this self-explanatory?

A Journey of Worth, particularly the 10th day of each round: “I am willing to understand how I must rise above the struggles and pains of the world. I am willing to rise again and again with each call for help, each outstretched hand. I am willing to be the one to choose to change. I offer my pain, suffering, guilt, and blame up for transformation, into the light of Love that I may see and give only the light of Love always.”

I am feeling as many pieces coming together as I do being ripped apart.

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