“Fiesta”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 29

Journey of the Heart - Day 29 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 29
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

Gratitude strikes our hearts like a bell, resounding love through our being.

Gratitude opens our hearts to Love’s purity, our very own essence!

We experience such deep gratitude for our hearts, our essence, our ALL of Life!

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

On this Journey, the most important thing is to spend time with your heart. It’s not about getting anywhere. It’s not about deciphering, interpreting, or understanding anything. It’s not about uncovering, unraveling, or deconstructing your inner depths.

It’s simply about being with your heart, without an agenda. Your heart is always with you. Your heart is always loving you and accepting you. For this Journey, love and accept your heart in return.

This Journey makes it simple and easy. Listen to the Guiding thought. Draw or color or paint. That’s all. Let your mind wander! Let your imagination flow! Be with your heart.

I am reminding myself that all is well. That, even if I think I might be doing something wrong, there is no wrong. There is no wrong. Not on the Journeys. There is only being on the Journey and allowing the Journey to teach you of yourself, through life. Life is the Journey, the Journey is life. The Journey ends when life ends…and life…is infinite and eternal.

All is well.

Your heart knows: All is well.

Be with your heart. Allow yourself to be with your heart. Allow your mind to let go. Allow your heart to open. Allow your depths to rise. Allow your own expansion.

Life is beautiful. Your heart is beautiful. You are beautiful. Be with your heart.

“Tangled Holiday Lights”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 28

Journey of the Heart - Day 28 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 28
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

Love-as-light streams from our hearts to all hearts!

We are connected by Love; we are One in Love.

Imagine these streams of love-as-light connecting with everyone in time and space.

Imagine receiving these streams of love-as-light as they return to you from everyone in time and space.

This is enough. We are One.

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

Before I began drawing today, thinking about light streaming from our hearts to all hearts and back, I knew I wanted some sort of web-representation. Then I started drawing and began (unintentionally) with the hexagram in the middle. It made me think of honeycomb; each cell is completely independent of the others yet supports the whole structure, which can be huge. It also made me think of the way bees work together to create the honeycomb.

Perhaps you don’t see it, the initial hexagram in the middle. It kind of got lost in the creative chaos of points and webs.

Though the tangle does a poor job representing any symmetry or balance, while I was drawing this, I thought the (real) connections and interactions of love-as-light probably have a lot more harmony inherent in them. I realized, I needed to add a correct hexagon, so that you could see the order and the connections more clearly.

Hexagram
Hexagram

Then I thought, Plato had a conception of “the Great Ordering One” or “the One Who Orders through Art”. In essence, this meant that all of life embodies symmetry, balance, harmony and order; these qualities are pre-existing, eternal ideas innate in all of life. Just look for a while at the hexagon above. There is such simple beauty to it and so many ways to see it, so many different triangles and connections. Can’t you imagine all of life has these qualities?

Looking at it (or drawing one, or coloring one) is a meditation all on its own. Here’s how to draw a hexagram, so that you can do it yourself, color it, do it again…

Tools necessary: Pen/pencil, straight edge, compass, paper.

  • Set your compass to any width. It can be fun to pick a width from your hand, like the length of your thumb, the distance between a middle knuckle and the tip of that finger, or the length of your pinky.
  • Draw a circle
  • Move the point of the compass from the middle of the circle to any point on the perimeter of the circle. Draw a half circle from that point, intersecting at the middle of the circle and at two points on the perimeter of the circle.
  • Move the compass to one of the two points you just made on the perimeter of the circle and draw another half circle, as in step 3.
  • Repeat step 4 until you have 6 points on the perimeter, and what looks like a flower inside the circle.
  • Connect the points at the perimeter creating the outer hexagon.
  • Connect the points inside the hexagon to create two equilateral triangles.
  • Viola! You are done. Repeat as many times as you like coloring each new hexagon a different way!

 

“Whirlin’ Swirlin'”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 27

Journey of the Heart - Day 27 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 27
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

We focus our heart-love in the service of each other.

As we serve each other through our deepest heart-love, our own love expands and becomes amplified.

There is always more love to share, to give, to experience!

Joy and gratitude fill us, when we open to our heart’s love!

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

I felt really good this morning. I felt a lot of self-acceptance: I like myself. And I felt happy. The two seemed related—liking myself and being happy. But what’s the relationship? Does liking myself make me happier or does being happy make me like myself more? Or are the two completely unrelated, and I just happened to like myself and be happy this morning?

Let me note, these feelings (liking myself and happy) were totally organic and natural this morning. They were just there. I didn’t think about them; I didn’t do anything to make them “happen”. There was simply this bubbling up of self-acceptance and happiness.

I don’t experience that kind of happiness all the time—but it is my pursuit! In fact, feeling happiness is one of the things that started this whole Journey “thing”. One day, back in 2013, I wrote this regarding happiness:

“Let me be clear: this was not just a moment of waking up and just feeling good (although it was also that). It was not a moment of looking at all the good things in my life and being thankful (although it was also that). It was not a just moment of being proud of how far I’ve come and how much I’ve accomplished (although it was even also that). It was a moment of deep, deep, satisfaction that rippled out infinitely as JOY. It was so peaceful and real that I want to share it with everyone. I want you to be happy, so deeply happy that your peace is unshakable, your joy is overflowing, and all you want is for everyone to know the joy you know.” (see full article here)

The happiness I felt this morning was only a fraction of what I described back in 2013. Happiness is so real and so amazing. We just don’t know, most of the time. Even I live “happiness” as more of a clichéd hope than a real feeling. But I know it’s real, and I keep coming back to it; it keeps feeding me, reminding me how real it is…and I’ve needed the reminders. There will come a time when happiness is the natural state, for all of us, all the time. We are bringing it closer every day.

In that same post, I said, “Happiness is tied to purpose”. I do not think it is a coincidence I got the HUGE reminder about how happiness feels this morning, and the next Journey is going to be Journey of Purpose 2.0 (beginning on February 22). I am SO happy about these Journeys, so thankful for them. I am thankful for your participation, for you being here, doing your part; we are doing it.

Journey of Purpose is going to be great; we are building the foundation for it through our hearts of joy!

I hope you are beginning to see either through my Journeys or on your own, how themes recur, how we revisit ideas, learning about them in new and different ways each time they come up. Each time as new parts of ourselves are revealed, or old parts are released, we keep moving forward. Moving forward intentionally, with purpose, together.

This last bit is not directly related to what I’ve written today, or to the Guiding Thought, but since I am feeling some anticipation for Journey of Purpose, and since I have talked about my occasional impatience, this seemed important to add today:

“On the spiritual path, things which ordinarily appear contradictory become complementary. Be impatiently patient, or be patiently impatient; but both have to be together. If you choose one, there is danger. Patience alone is going to become laziness; impatience alone is going to become unnecessary anguish, anxiety. They both are needed, balanced; so impatience keeps you longing, waiting, and patience keeps you from becoming tense, from creating anxiety. Both have their parts to fulfill on the spiritual path.”

-Osho

The Rebellious Spirit, Chapter Seven

more here: https://wordpress.com/read/post/feed/485517/915935506

“How to Listen with Love”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 26

Journey of the Heart - Day 26 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 26
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

We listen to our hearts and with our hearts.

Our hearts pay attention to each other; we listen to each other’s inner voice, the unspoken words.

We care, and we attend with love to each other’s deeper, silent needs, asking each other’s heart, “How may I strengthen you and raise your energy?”

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

“The basic nature of sentient beings is the capacity for enlightenment…

To understand that all sentient beings possess the foundation for becoming enlightened, you need analytical wisdom. First, you need to understand that all your problems stem from your mind’s mistaken view of yourself, of other people, and of all things existing in and of themselves. When you see that this is a mistake, you realize that you can become enlightened, after which you can extend this realization to all sentient beings…this lays the groundwork for developing a desire to help everyone toward enlightenment…

With it, you can engender a strong aspiration to help others by achieving your own enlightenment.”

Becoming Enlightened

His Holiness the Dalai Lama,

translated by Jeffrey Hopkins, Ph.D.

 

Do you see that we are doing this right now? We are, “engendering a strong aspiration to help others by achieving our own enlightenment.” This Journey, this day, this moment, we are doing it. Let’s look at the quote from the Dalai Lama in the context of the Journey:

First, we need analytical wisdom (thank God!). What does that do for us? We use analytical wisdom to look at our thoughts, to observe our minds, and to discern how we are thinking and then decide if that is how we want to be thinking.

This quote from the Dalai Lama is (of course) from a Buddhist perspective. But analytical wisdom can apply to any framework; analytical wisdom is about being aware of how you think, in order to choose how you want to think.

Many people know how they want to think (and most people think they already are thinking how they want to think). People (in general…I know this is a wide assumption, but bear with me) want to be righteous, upstanding, good parents, good partners, good people. Someone once said to me, “People don’t do things because they think it’s wrong. People do things because they think it’s right.” And I think that is correct, for the most part. People do things because they think what they are doing is right.

Yet, this “right thinking” can cause a lot of pain, struggle, effort, stress for the person and for others. Why? “All your problems stem from your mind’s mistaken view of yourself, of other people, and of all things existing in and of themselves.”

What the Dalai Lama is saying here is that the underlying thoughts about what it means to be “right” are really wrong (“mistaken”). So, when a person is doing what they think is right, there is a good chance they are really thinking or acting from a mistaken viewpoint.

The mistaken viewpoint, according to the Dalai Lama is, “people and things exist in and of themselves.” In A Course in Miracles, this would be called Separation. In Buddha Dharma, the “correct” way of thinking is Dependent Arising: all things and people are dependent upon all things and people; in A Course in Miracles the corrective is Atonement: At-One-Ment.

This is why we need to begin with analytical wisdom. Where do our thoughts originate? In a framework that includes others, or excludes them? In a thought process that sees others as separate from ourselves, or as equal with ourselves?

Every sentient being has the capacity for enlightenment. These Journeys are designed from this foundation. Their contemplative nature provokes your analytical wisdom and asks you to think about what you think, and what you want to think. This is one reason there can be disruptive thoughts during the Journey; your mind is vying with itself over its dominant thoughts. The Journeys give you thoughts of Oneness, of Love, of Peace, if you choose to accept them and replaces thoughts of separation or disharmony with them. The rounds are designed to bring you to a place of inclusion, so you learn to have thoughts that consider others naturally.

Our hearts pay attention to each other; we listen to each other’s inner voice, the unspoken words. We care, and we attend with love to each other’s deeper, silent needs, asking each other’s heart, “How may I strengthen you and raise your energy?”

Do you want to become enlightened? Do you believe it’s possible?

I do.

And I sincerely want to help strengthen and raise your energy. I have a strong desire to help you to enlightenment. That’s why I’m here.

 

“Waking Love”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 25

Journey of the Heart - Day 25 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 25
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

We bring our awareness to our hearts and resonate with their love.

Naturally and easily our heart-love radiates through us.

Love is present now—rippling in to the future, releasing the past.

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

Sing it with me now, “Going out of my head over you, out of my head over you…out of my head day and night, night and day and night…” (See video below). My heart was singing this to me, and I think my heart has a sense of humor, because I do feel like I’m going out of my head, double entendre intentional.

Getting out of the head and into the heart can feel a bit insane, especially for those of us who are not so used to it. I’ve been feeling—actually, I should say—I’ve been thinking, “I really need to think.” “I need to sit with my mind and do some heavy contemplating.” “I just don’t feel right, something is wrong; I haven’t thought enough lately.” And I’ve almost felt panicked about it. Ok, I have felt panicked about it.

Isn’t that funny? I find it both funny and pathetic…>smh< …because it is how I feel. I don’t feel right.

Granted, there could be many things going on here; this not feeling right may have nothing to do with the Journey or my heart. But, my experience with the Journeys is a) appropriate stuff comes-up in relation to the Journey b) everything takes on the resonance of the Journey. I would say my feelings are both, appropriate and appropriately resonant.

What do I do?

The thing is: I can’t even think about the answer to this question…MY MIND DOESN’T HAVE A CLUE. There are no answers my mind can offer. So…what do I do?

I keep on with the Journey. These are baby steps of an unfamiliar ilk, wading through my emotions without the comfort of my mind to console and guide me.

As for the picture today, my heart is really being a pip, coming at me full force with her wit and humor. “Waking Love” is the name of the picture today, and it’s another double entendre. The Guiding Thought is about resonating, rippling, radiating, and releasing: you might say these are some qualities of waves. The picture then has the blue and green rectangles on the right “whooshing” down the line to the left and dispersing…kind of like the wake left by a boat. So, “Waking Love” is both about the motion created by something moving through a substance, creating a wake, and about this motion as it happens when Love is awakened.

Pretty sneaky, heart.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3j9bAVqt3c (at 1:08)

“Rock Solid”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 24

Journey of the Heart - Day 24 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 24
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

How can we deepen and expand our relationship with our beautiful, blissful hearts?

How can we give our love, our wisdom, our compassion more openly and freely?

How can we know our hearts of love, as ourselves?

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

How does one draw questions? Or is the drawing supposed to be the answers to the questions, from the heart? I asked myself these questions for several minutes before drawing today and ultimately decided it was both. In a similar way to “giving is receiving”, the drawing is both an expression of the question and its answer.

I felt, as I was drawing, this was an exercise in seek and you shall find. But the way this came through my mind was, “You’ll never get an answer if you don’t ask the question.”

In the mind, this is a linear progression: first you ask the question, then you get an answer. But what I felt with the heart is it’s not linear at all. The heart processes the question and the answer at the same time. The heart knows the questions before you ask them and it already has the answers. Through the drawing today, I felt this. But it’s not like the heart “comes up with” and answer; it’s more like the question and the answer are the same thing, like giving and receiving. It’s kind of a tough concept to wrap my head around, but I know there is something to this, something I am exploring through this bypassing-my-mind process.

As for the drawing today: The big jewel-type thing on the bottom represents the deepening of the relationship with our hearts. Its colors are dark and rich, representing depth and mystery; there is a lot to explore. The jewel above it represents “How can we know our hearts of love, as ourselves?” The colors in the smaller jewel mimic the ones in the larger jewel, but lighter; it’s like the depth and mystery becomes transformed through the expression as ourselves. Then the gold/silver lining around the upper jewel represents “How can we give our love, our wisdom, our compassion more openly and freely?” Once the depth comes up through us, then we are able to simply radiate it, as it comes through us.

It was as though through the drawing, my heart was saying, “See, it’s easy; this is how you do it.” And the drawing was the road map. Now if I can just follow it.

 

“Lovortex”: Journey of the Heart 2.0 – Day 23

Journey of the Heart - Day 23 Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls
Journey of the Heart – Day 23
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

lovortex – noun \ ləv \ˈvȯr-teks \ : a mass of spinning, strong or constant affection for a person, persons, or all sentient beings which causes the center of one to resemble a whirlpool. (Word created by Susan Billmaier, Jan. 25, 2016. Definition philosophically argued over and decided on by Susan Billmaier & Tam Black, Jan. 25, 2016.)

 

Guiding Thought

We follow the guidance of our hearts and experience life anew!

We express love, and experience love everywhere.

We find new ways to love; we recognize new depths and nuances of love.

We are patient. We are kind. We are wise and we respond to life with love, as love.

-Play the Guiding Thought here (loops automatically).
Journey of the Heart audio created by Brad Vanlandingham for Susanwithpearls-

 

Sharing

“We are patient…” This made me laugh. Actually, it made me shake my head. I have been feeling anything but patient today. There’s just so much to do. You know how they say, “If you love what you do, you never work a day in your life”? That’s how I feel. I just want to work! Get stuff done! I keep coming up with new things that I want to do, too! It feels exhilarating, and yet I need to be patient because I can’t get it all done right now. I think the picture conveys this desire for energetic outburst; I also think the rectangles are the reminder to be patient: a bit of solidity and structure accompanying the explosion.

This Journey of the Heart is messing with me, a bit. If you’ve read any of my more thoughtful, contemplative, intellectual stuff, you know that in my head is where I am comfortable. That’s of course a big reason to do Journey of the Heart, to add balance.

I have all these feelings…I mean…emotions, as well as senses—the subtleties I’ve been mentioning.  And I’m not quite sure what they are saying or what I am supposed to do with them. It is very odd territory for me. I am getting the same sense about my emotions that I mentioned just yesterday: I feel inadequate about my feelings…I feel like “I’m not doing it right”…I hope I am not letting you down with my inability to write about these feelings!

I like figuring things out, looking at things from different angles, finding different pieces and putting them together. I don’t know how to do that with feelings, with sensations, or with these subtle energy movements. None of the pieces make any sense to me, much less how they fit together, and I can’t even think about them because that defeats the purpose.  More than that, I can’t write about them because words themselves defeat the expression of the heart.

“When the heart speaks, the heart no longer speaks.”