“Simple Is Sometimes Best”: Journey of Abundance 2.0 – Day 02

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

I choose to expand my consciousness and open my heart to Divine Love’s flow within me. Realizing my own Divine Presence, I know God as the Source and Fulfillment of all my good.



I read an article today which addressed “financial slavery”. It said, in a nutshell, that financial slavery is due to basically two situations 1) spending more than you make 2) debt. The solution was 1) reduce spending (and the main suggestion was move to a “cheaper” neighborhood) 2) consolidate debt, create more income, payoff debt.

This article was touted as “insightful” and “key”. No wonder I feel out of step with mainstream ideas of what constitutes financial freedom. Financial freedom to me means being in control of my time by being be able to use my intuition and creativity to serve people in ways they find valuable, and are willing to pay me for. (This is a working definition; it will probably evolve over time, as this is really the first time I have thought about my own definition of financial freedom). Inherent in my definition is the idea of having a business, being a business owner—doing “it” on my own terms. I would really like to hear your thoughts on what financial freedom means to you. What is your definition? How do you think of financial freedom? Leave me a note below, or email me. Help me become clearer on my own definition, by sharing yours.

I did not receive a lot of value initially from the article I mention, but I did realize that one thing I am not good at is bridging the metaphysical with the material. I have high ideals, powerful thoughts, and absolute integrity with God and my Self, but I am not so good at bringing those things into financial reality, particularly as a business.

But that’s one of the things I’m here to learn, and I trust that I am learning it, even now. I am also absolutely confident that I will succeed, with complete fulfillment of and reliance on my spiritual ideals.

I have one short meditation that I do which works with my consciousness on realizing my Soul Purpose. One phrase in the meditation is, “My Soul needs me to become a master in the physical world over form and matter for my spiritual advancement, for the benefit of All.”

And this is where the Guiding Thought comes in: The Spiritual (God, Divine Love) comes through me. This is the lesson. This is what I am here to learn and be. God (Divine Love) knows everything that is absolutely right for me, and also knows how to bring that to me so it is also absolutely right for everyone else on the planet, with only benefit to All. God is the Source and Fulfillment of all my good.

Since I don’t know what that thing is that brings all good to All, I must trust God, and get my mind– which thinks it knows better than God, or that gets scared that God isn’t doing the “right thing”–out of the way.

How do I do that? I choose to expand my consciousness and open my heart to Divine Love’s flow within me.

All of this came out in my drawing today. My mind is expanding, opening to the flow; my heart is open to the flow, and the Divine Presence pours forth. I needed a way to capture the idea of God as the Source and Fulfillment of all my good in a manner that also demonstrates the trust I have in God to bring forth what is for my highest good, and the highest good of everyone on the planet. That is what all the squares represent. Since I don’t know and I did not want to limit God’s idea with my own, I needed a symbol for the idea of “highest good for All”—squares. Sometimes simple is best.

Journey of Abundance 2.0 – Day 02
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

“Step Into The Shade”: Journey of Abundance 2.0 – Day 01

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

Divine Love-Light is the Source of All. It is all good, all God. This Source is always seeking expression through me. My awareness of my personal identity as this Source provides me with infinite fulfillment and prosperity.



I am feeling a lot of anxiety, trepidation, uncertainty, and doubt as I begin this Journey. The reason for this is because I have been working on something for a while now, and I am growing impatient with seeing (or not seeing) results. I know this is my mind getting in the way. I know this is “me” wanting to control things, make something happen. This is having expectation, thinking about the future, not accepting now. There is so much wrapped up in abundance, for a lot of people—and clearly for me. There are issues of worthiness, fear of failure, fear of success, issues of time, goals, purpose, happiness, care-giving, comfort, aging, and survival, speaking here for myself. I feel like there is something I need to just shift, like I am missing something, and if I would just get it, everything would change…so I keep trying to get it, I keep pressing at it, poking it, but that just pushes it away it seems. My mind wants to do it, to make something happen, to make the shift, but it does not know how.

The good news is, these are the “barriers within myself that I have built against it”, which I can now dissolve.

The mind can’t tell the mind to stop and step aside. Involving the mind to remove the mind only perpetuates the involvement of the mind. How does one stop the mind, without telling the mind to stop?

There was a man
who was so disturbed
by the sight of his own shadow
and so displeased with his own footsteps
that he determined to get rid of both.

The method he hit upon was to run away from them.
So he got up and ran.

But every time he put his foot down
there was another step,
while his shadow kept up with him
without the slightest difficulty.

He attributed his failure
to the fact he was not running fast enough.
So he ran faster and faster, without stopping
until he finally dropped dead.

He failed to realize
that if he merely stepped into the shade,
his shadow would vanish,
and if he sat down and stayed still,
there would be no footsteps.
(Traditional Zen story)

Step into the shade. That is going to be my daily reminder for this Journey.

Also throughout this Journey, you may see some of my personal drawings, like in Journey of the Heart. Drawing/coloring connects to the sub-conscious a bit more directly, or at least allows me to communicate with my Self in a different way. Here is the drawing that I did today, before beginning to write:

Journey of Abundance 2.0 – Day 01
Susan Billmaier for susanwithpearls

What struck me, as I listened to the Guiding Thought and colored was the part that says, “My awareness…provides me with infinite fulfillment and prosperity.” Awareness is what I focused on while coloring; that is the red around me and in front of me; that is what goes before me to provide infinite fulfillment and prosperity. When/if you do drawing/coloring like this on your Journeys, let your inner-child play. These are not meant to be “serious” or realistic. If you were a child drawing your heart’s desires, how would it come out? I was honestly a bit surprised that I drew a house to represent “infinite fulfillment and prosperity”. I’m not sure what that means. But that’s the point (no mind!).

Welcome to the Journey! I’m glad you are here.

2016 Journey of Abundance Declaration, Commitment, and Dedication


I declare my intention to do whatever I can for the next 40 days to transmute the barriers I have created within myself to knowing the abundance of Life, in me, through me, around me, as me. I declare myself free from bonds that would negate my Divine Self which knows Itself as Full and Fulfilled.


First, I am committed to fulfilling 40 days of meditation/contemplation and writing with focus, engagement, and involvement in the exploration and discovery of my Self of abundance.

Second, in my ongoing commitment to the enlightenment of everyone on the planet, I commit again to doing a daily prayer/mediation for the upliftment and enlightenment of the 7.4 billion people on the planet.

Third, I continue in my commitment to the practice of earth, and will continue to work out and eat “really” healthy, including primarily raw fruits and vegetables, and to continue to exercise.


I dedicate this Journey to you and to your abundance. May you know yourself as the Fulfillment you are, as the Giver and the Gift; may all anxiety or suffering you experience be transmuted by Love, to Love. May you know yourself as everything you could ever want, within and without.

Why a Journey of Abundance 2016

Public Domain Image
Public Domain Image

It’s a new beginning! Welcome! It’s time to get clear, time to focus. Why DO I want to do this Journey of Abundance? What is important to me? What are my priorities? Where do I want to grow? What do I want to change? Let me begin to get clear by thinking about what abundance means to me now.

Right now, abundance has to do with vitality, energy, productivity, motivation, and time to give those things in service to others and the world.

In a way, then, abundance follows from Journey of Healing, since vitality and energy are quintessential qualities of being Whole and Healthy (in my opinion).

Vitality and energy lead naturally to motivation and productivity. I love when I am so excited and enthusiastic about something that I can spend hours at it and the time flies.

That leaves time, because in order to utilize energy and vitality toward motivation and productivity, one must have the time to get lost in projects, when the time flies.

Even though all that makes sense, I am honestly feeling very unclear at the moment. What do I want? I can feel issues of unworthiness creeping in; I feel afraid to state boldly, fearlessly this is what I want. I feel almost afraid to want anything. What am I allowed to wish for?  What am I allowed to want? If I want something, aren’t I being greedy, or selfish? How do I balance needing money to live with living a spiritual life, or with spiritual principles?

Intellectually, I know: money and material goods are neutral. There is nothing “unspiritual” about them, there is no one who would blame me for using money to support myself and my family. Money can do a lot of good for a lot of people.

Emotionally, it seems I have some opposition, some resistance. Maybe I need to back up a step. What did I learn on the last Journey?

AHHHHHHHH…I just realized why this “abundance thing” is uncomfortable at the moment…During Journey of Healing, and especially at the end,  I did a lot with light and love—stuff that is heavy-spiritual, not exactly material. The pendulum swung toward the spiritual, apparently the back swing to materiality is a bit disconcerting to my brain/emotions.

To put this in perspective, I turn to my teacher, John Randolph Price:

Do you have an aversion to wealth? Do you object to being rich? Does the word “abundance” bother you? If you have the slightest reservations, then you’d better check your belief system regarding God. You see, God is omnipresent Wealth, the Infinite Riches of the universe, the lavish Abundance of creation. And if you deny unlimited prosperity, you are denying yourself, because YOU are the image of omnipresent wealth, the expression of the infinite riches of the universe, an individualization of lavish abundance. You are as rich right now as any individual who ever walked on this planet. The cattle on a thousand hills are yours, the gold and silver are yours, and an abundance of money is yours now! (The Abundance Book, p. 18-19, 1987, Quartus edition)

My mind needs abundance healing!

Like in the Journey of Healing, I need to transmute or transform my beliefs (which bring about my experience) of those things that fall short of the Wholeness, Fullness of God (Love), into an experience of God (Love), including my relationship with money, wealth, prosperity, and success.

Thus, the first thing I am working on is transmuting or transforming my thoughts/beliefs about God-Love-Fulfillment, so that I include the material aspects of money, wealth, and success into my idea of God-Love-Fulfillment.

This includes the second thing I am going to work on, which I have mentioned quite a bit this year (but it just makes so much sense): “Your task is not to seek for love abundance, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” – Rumi

Finally, by the end of the Journey, I want to be clear about what material success means to me. How much is enough? What do I need? What does prosperity look like to me, as me, in my unique situation? What material life would bring me the most joy, the most happiness, the most fulfillment?

Feel free to share your thoughts about WHY you are doing this Journey in the comments! I’m so glad you are here—it’s going to be fun (but then, it always is…). Blessings to you!

A Journey of Healing 2.0 – Afterword

I took the time between Journeys to rest very seriously this time! I am so relaxed that I am not quite sure what to do with myself, so relaxed I practically forgot what I am supposed to be doing, so relaxed that I had to go back to remind myself what I wrote throughout Journey of Healing.

That was a good thing… I re-read the entire Journey to refresh my memory. It’s funny to me that I forget what I write, then I go back and read something and think, “wow, that sounds intense” (because I’ve forgotten what I had written, and more particularly, the experience of it).

Here is my usual self-assessment for the end of Journey of Healing:  I did really well. I would not have realized how well I did, had I not gone back and read the Journey, but in doing so, I can confirm: I did really well.

>big smile, patting myself on the back<

  • Finding and releasing barriers to healing. YES. DONE. CHECK. >8.5 on a scale of 10<
  • Maintaining a consistent exercise and eating (cleanse) plan. YES. DONE. CHECK. >9 on a scale of 10<
  • Transforming/transfiguring situations “not like Love” to Love. PRETTY GOOD. NOT PERFECT. YES. CHECK. >7.5 on a scale of 10<

I encourage you all to go back and read what you wrote on your Journey. How did you do? If you don’t go back and look, you may be inclined to think you didn’t do so well (especially if you have not completely released all of your self-deprecating patterns. How do I know? Because I, too, am inclined to think “I didn’t do very well”!).

Refreshing yourself on your own Journey gives you context! How do you know where you are, if you don’t know what you’ve done? How do you know where you are going, if you don’t know where you’ve been? Write it down. Read it. You are your best reference for YOU, your own best expert. Pat yourself on the back. Congratulate yourself. You have done so well! 

On that note, I am also going to go back and read the last Journey of Abundance, which ended a little over a year ago. Why? So I know where my head was then, and I can think about how far I’ve come, how much I’ve grown in the past year, and how I might best approach this Journey of Abundance, beginning tomorrow.

I encourage you to do the same. Read what you wrote on your last Journey of Abundance. Where are you now, in relation to where you were then? What has improved? What have you accomplished? What have you learned? What patterns have you released? Where do you want to go? What do you want to focus on?

But I am getting ahead of myself, aren’t I? That is really fodder for tomorrow’s post. But you get the idea (and apologies in advance for any redundancy tomorrow!).

Yes, so Journey of Healing, was a great success. There was a depth that I achieved mentally-spiritually which I cannot convey, but there was an intensity to many of the visualizations and meditations that I did throughout the Journey. Those types of “accomplishments” are not quantitative. And they are only subjectively qualitative—you will never really know my experience, as I will never really know yours.

Thus, only I (or you) can determine my (or your) own accomplishment. I am here to tell you, though, that if you simply did the Journey—you made a great accomplishment. Even if you spent only a few minutes a day, or a few minutes a week, with my Journey, or in your own mind, being willing, seeking, wanting healing…that’s an accomplishment. Small drops matter. You matter. Your mind matters. Your thoughts matter. Every little bit that you contribute to lifting yourself lifts us all.

Tomorrow we get right back to it! Journey of Abundance!  YES.


“Masquerading Light”: Journey of Healing 2.0 – Day 40

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

I give today to Light. I feel the Light within pour forth; I feel my radiance, my glow. I see—with my inner eye—this light envelop and infuse all I encounter, all my words, and all my actions. I watch as others resonate with me, their light growing brighter in the sanctity of my own. To all beings and all situations today, I offer only light, and learn, as I do, the Wholeness of my Self.



I’ve thought for a long time that humans are Light, masquerading as bodies. The feeling is kind of like the Wayne Dyer quote, “You’re a spiritual being having a human experience”. So, to paraphrase this, “You’re a Light Being having a human experience”. I never quite felt the truth in the Wayne Dyer quote, but I feel something, some stirring of recognition, when I paraphrase the quote using “Light Being”.

When I read today’s Guiding Thought, it’s almost like my entire being says, “Yes! This is what I want, this is who I am”.

In the spirit of being Light, giving light, and offering light to the Wholeness of my Self, I’d like to take a moment and give you light, right now. Take a minute to receive it…

In addition to Light, I feel so much love and appreciation for all of you out there, reading this, or not reading this. I have so much love and appreciation for all of the people doing the work, learning to love themselves more, helping others, being their own light, being an inspiration, finding their own way. If you are reading this, that means you. Thank you.

Our work, the work of love, of light, of service, is so necessary. Each of you making this contribution in your own life, taking any time what so ever to find ways to love, to find ways to give, are making a difference. Each of you sharing your stories, helping others, creating a network of empathy and compassion, are making a difference. I love you and appreciate you; you are so important to Life and its process.

As you recall, this Journey—and each round—begins with basically 3 days of emptying the mind and releasing any (old) notions of “what healing is”. Throughout this Journey I have thought (but not written), “What does this have to do with healing? What have I healed? What are the results? What is the relevance?” I have now figured out that the Journeys rarely lead me on a path of logic, but they always lead me appropriately, so I just “go with it”.

And I just realized, this moment of such deep love and appreciation for all of you, this recognition of Wholeness with you, this is the healing. We are Whole. We are Holy. I love you. The Journey is at an end (for now!).

There will be a short break for reflection on the whole Journey. I will post the afterword within the week! Then on to the next—Journey of Abundance begins July 28!


Please enjoy this uplifting song of revitalization, hope, and pleasure of Life at the end of a Journey (the “theme song” for day 40)! 

“Literal and Figurative”: Journey of Healing – Day 39

Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Before I get started today, I have a confession about yesterday. After I did the Journey, and talked about making the decision for the Whole and Holy Self, I went on with my day…and I had a moment of completely forgetting the Whole and Holy Self. I find that driving is the place where my more volatile emotions feel comfortable expressing themselves. No, I don’t get road rage. Yes, I do get very frustrated and angry at people who don’t DRIVE their cars, pulling out in front of me and going only 20 mph, braking at a green light, making a turn, then not accelerating. Sometimes I yell at people who do these types of things (“big peddle on the right!!”). No, I don’t swear at them. No, I don’t flip them off. It’s more like I just talk to them, sometimes very energetically and loudly. That happened yesterday. My behavior upset me. How can I be doing all of this spiritual work, and succumb to that kind of abandonment of principles? I felt guilty. Then I felt bad about feeling guilty… Then I let it go. Oh well. If getting a bit hot while driving is the worst behavior of my day and no one got hurt…I can forgive myself and move on.

I tell you this mainly because recently while watching Craig Ferguson on Join of Die, I was reminded that “Americans do not like hypocrisy…Charlie Sheen can be on the Late Show and say he loves hookers and alcohol, and the audience applauds…” but if someone like Bill Cosby falls, people really despise them, as much for what they did as for pretending to be otherwise.  I think I do a pretty good job of being transparent here, and not making any personal grandiose claims, but just to make sure you know…I had to make my “confession”.  🙂

And now the Journey!


Guiding Thought

I am the Light of Love. Light saturates my mind and body, surrounding every thought, and radiating out to All. Everything radiates Light in return. Everywhere is Light. I rest in Peace, Being Light.


I love the idea of being Light. I always have, and I think about it a lot. It feels like something that is deep, old, familiar, and real. It’s like I feel like of course I am Light. But then, I’m not, I have this material body, so there’s a disconnection. But part of me feels like being Light is natural, normal, and once I think it enough and really focus on the Truth of Who I AM, then my body will be light.

Along these lines, I think about Jesus and the Transfiguration. He became light. And he also said, “all of this and more than this shall you also do”. So, it’s plausible I can become Light, right?

I also think about how I need to treat my body in order for it to become light. I think about what foods to eat, how much to fast (if at all), how to change my body to make it easy for it to become Light.

All of this is a literal interpretation of the Guiding Thought. I have a long way to go for this literal interpretation to actualize in my body.

Not everyone thinks about being Light in a literal sense. The Guiding Thought can certainly be interpreted in a figurative sense as well, where “Light” is the energy of Love, and represents you being the Love You Are.

I actually use the Guiding Thought in both the literal and figurative sense. I see myself as Light, and I see myself giving Love as Light to All. Whichever the case, I know it feels really good to think about Light.

“The River Delta Mind”: Journey of Healing 2.0 – Day 38

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

I decide today to be aware of my Whole and Holy Self working within me, expressing through me. As I move through the affairs of my life, with an open mind and empty hands, I look first to my Whole and Holy Self for guidance. My only decision today is to be aware of my Whole and Holy Self—all other decisions arise out of this, in conjunction with my Self.



A decision is different than a simple statement of intention. The word decision comes from the Latin dēcīsiō, which means to cut off.  Think of your decision-making process like a river delta symbolizing different pathways in your brain where possible outcomes can flow. Then think about “cutting off” the flow to all but one of those pathways. That’s a decision.

If today we decide to be aware of the Whole and Holy Self, which means cutting off any activity of the lower mind. That means paying 100% attention to the Truth of us, expressing through us. (If you need a refresher on this, just look at yesterday’s post).

I know, I know. It’s not easy to do, especially when moving through the affairs of life. Those activities can be so distracting! Here is something I am working on for this: the affairs of life are Life itself. Embrace them as part of the Wholeness, as part of your Wholeness. And how do you do that? You do it by looking to your Whole and Holy Self for guidance.

That’s it. Decide today to be aware of the Whole and Holy Self, first, last, always. Everything else follows.

“Seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven and all things shall be added unto you.”  The Kingdom of Heaven is within you; the Kingdom of Heaven is you, your Whole and Holy YOU.

Copyright attribution: English Wikipedia user Decumanus

“The Truth of We”: Journey of Healing 2.0 – Day 37

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

Love is Wholeness. The essence of Love is Peace. The essence of Wholeness is Unity. My essence is Love, therefore, my essence is Peace; my essence is Unity. Since my essence is Unity, I share Love and Peace Wholly. Knowing the Unity of Whole Love and Peace with All is the essence of Holiness. I choose to be aware, to understand and to Know my Whole and Holy Self, which is Love. 



I’m now interpreting this Guiding Thought in light of yesterday’s sharing, THE ALL in the All, because, what is more Whole than The ALL in the All and the All in ALL? I know it’s hard to talk about this stuff without sounding like I’m just playing word games…but I’ll try.

Think about it: What if you had 100 percent certainty, complete knowing that EVERYTHING (“The ALL”) was inside of you? What if you knew with absolutely no doubt that ALL of the love, presence, power, harmony, abundance, and intelligence of EVERYTHING is right there in you, as you? That’s your essence, the essence of Love…wouldn’t that give you deep and abiding peace?

And if you knew all that love, presence, power, harmony, abundance, and intelligence of EVERYTHING was also in everyone and everything else, as them, wouldn’t you feel Unity with everything around you?

And if you felt that Unity with everything around you wouldn’t you be absolutely happy to share that Love and Peace Wholly, with everyone and everything, knowing that they are doing the same thing, because they know and feel the same way?

That’s Holiness. That’s the Truth of You, the Truth of me, the Truth of we. One. Whole. Holy. Together.