Child-Distractions: Journey of Freedom 2017–Day 08

Copyright Tam Black 2015
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

My connection with the Infinite Source of Love is and always has been enough. Love loves me always, everywhere. Assured in love, I am perfectly loveable and perfectly loving with all people in all situations. 

Reflection

I was surprisingly focused while contemplating the Guiding Thought today. My mind did not wander at all! This is a bit odd, because most of the day I have felt like my mind has been in an ADD loop—I have not been able to stay focused on one thing for more than a few minutes, so I have been looping through about 5 different things over and over, a few minutes with each, one at a time.

I did enlist some help for the Journey, though. It was important to me to be focused on this Guiding Thought; it is something I believe in, something I find useful, and something I want to bring into my life in greater and greater quantities. I found a YouTube video (embedded below) with 639 HZ, which is supposedly the frequency of “the miracle tone of Love”.

Admittedly, I have not done much research on the Solfeggio Frequencies, and  I am by no means someone whose opinion should matter on this particular topic (if you are, please let me know what you think!), but I do know that when I have experimented with Solfeggio Frequencies, I do feel a change in my energy. I’ve been listening to it for about 30 minutes, and it seems to be keeping my mind from wandering.

Every little bit helps, and today, I felt like I really needed it.

The biggest insight that I had with today’s Guiding Thought was simply how much I wanted the results of it. Especially today.

I knew that there would be a lot going on during the month of August. This is why my initial intention for freedom was the release of judgement.

Here we are 9 short days into August, and boy, has there been a lot going on (see yesterday, and that is just a partial list).

What I did not anticipate regarding “everything going on” was my stress response. I have been having a noticeable stress response! –Physically and spiritually (as in, how it’s affected my practices, not in my actual Soul-Divine Self, because That is always above the stress of the mundane).

First, physically, I have been eating foods that I have not “craved” in years. Yes, meat. And carbs, lots of carbs. And sugar. If we had gummy bears in the house, I would have eaten them all.

Thank goodness that I am judging nothing! Otherwise, this would be an ideal opportunity to really come down hard on myself.

Second, with my spiritual practices, I have had that four-year old inner child-voice going on: “But I don’t waaaaannnnaaaaa”.  Of course, I know that I do want to, that this voice is not me, not my mature me.

But here’s the thing, it’s almost like that inner child is sabotaging my practices. It comes out with me feeling indecisive and incompetent.

These practices that I have been doing with constancy, are suddenly foreign to me, and I feel completely inept at them. Moreover, as I am feeling this, I begin to think, “Ok, how do I simplify? What is the simplest practice I can do? What will accomplish the stilling of my mind, and the opening of my heart?”  And I can’t even decide on that.

Let me give you an example: When I began today’s Journey, I knew I wanted some (help in the form of) background music so my mind would focus. I really wanted the mantra Om Namah Shivaya (because it is the go-to mantra). I went to YouTube to find one. Yes, of course I have playlists I could have used; yes I have particular artists/chants I really like…but no, the inner child did not want any of those. I (rather, she) had to find the perfect one – and the inner child was very specific about what the style was (not ones that are really slow; she wanted one that was upbeat). I went through half-dozen videos (at least a half-dozen!) and none of them were “right”. Then I thought, maybe the Gayatri Mantra…or…maybe Om So Ham…So I went through some of those videos. Even the ones that are my “go to” chants did not satisfy the inner child.

Meanwhile (and an hour later…) in the right-column there were the “suggestions” and there were several that were the Solfeggio Frequencies. Finally, I put my foot down and told the inner child that this one is going to have to do. I cannot be distracted with the whims of my inner child. At least not for too long.

Now, here we are. Journey Accomplished. I can still feel the inner child on the fringes, waiting for the opportunity to try to distract me again…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s