I Am My Brothers’ Keeper: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 08

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

When I lift my vibration into Peace and Harmony, all are lifted with me. With this awareness comes great responsibility: I am a Peace steward of all humanity, of all Life. Eternal Peace is my natural state. I joyfully and easily share it with all, and fulfill my Divine Purpose in the world.

Reflection

I felt alternating desire for accomplishment, and fear of failure while reading the Guiding Thought.

On the one hand, I feel the gravity of being a Peace steward, and the enormity of the responsibility. And a part of me wants that; I want the responsibility.

A part of me seems to understand that the first two sentences are merely stating facts: this is how it is, don’t fight it; it’s just who you are. 

Yet a different part feels so much fear about the implications of that, the weight of responsibility, the fear of failure. How can do what needs to be done, in the job of being a Peace steward? This amount of responsibility must be “difficult”…

…but then, in the very next sentences, the Guiding Thought is assuring me of how naturally, easily, and joyfully I can accomplish it.

Further, not only does it declare how naturally, easily, and joyfully I am able to accomplish it, but that this is in fact my Divine Purpose.

It’s as though this Guiding thought is designed to raise a bunch of fear, then wipe it away by declaring that success is inevitable, fulfilling not just my will, but Divine Will, too.

 

Sorry, No Answers Today: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 07

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

The Peace of God is stronger than my self-constructed obstacles to it. I open my mind to holy communion with the Divine. Brought to union with God, obstacles crumble. Peace stands victorious. I am that Peace.

Reflection

I felt like I had a lot of self-constructed obstacles to Peace just reading the Guiding Thought today.

The more I contemplated, and tried to commune with the Divine and offer up my obstacles, the more I created obstacles. My obstacles were creating more obstacles, then those obstacles created obstacles. What a loop! Instead of “crumbling” and dissolving, each crumble became a head of a hydra and grew back 9 more obstacles.

Here are some examples:

I need to just relax. How do I relax? Open my mind How do I open my mindI am that Peace. How can I be Peace, when I haven’t figured out how to open my mind? The Peace of God is stronger than…If it’s stronger than these obstacles why do I have these obstacles? What is my mind doing? I know the answer is right here, right in front of my face. Why is it no working?

While all this was going on, there was a part of me that knew that I know, but that I was just not accessing it–very similar to a couple days ago.

In my conscious brain, I simply could not get further than the words. I had trouble feeling, and I had trouble understanding. But I also knew that I can understand, that I do understand.

The mind wants to make it difficult. the mind needs to be valued. So it does what it knows to do to be valuable.

It reminds me of those employees who create problems so they can “fix” them (so they have value), or the ones who nit pick about schedules (they have to have oversight, so they are “doing” something!), or the ones who make mountains out of molehills, to seem important, and “show” that they have really big ideas!

Funny how my mind’s antics can be seen in the “real” work-a-day world.

Maybe this is what my mind was showing me? maybe I need to recognize that the behavior I see outside of me, is the behavior inside of me.

While I was contemplating the Guiding Thought, I was also thinking: this is not difficult, I know how to do this. I’ve done this hundreds of times before.

What I was referring to was surrender. Letting go of self-created obstacles feels a lot like surrendering them at the alter of God, letting them go, asking for purification. I have worked a lot on surrender. Why did this day feel so difficult, so full of obstacles?

No answers today. Just more to contemplate. Oh, and don’t worry. I doabsolutely believe the Peace of God is stronger than this…even if I don’t understand it today.

 

Questions Answered: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 06

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

I prepare my mind for Peace. I prepare my mind to recognize that above all else, I want the Peace that passeth understanding. Today, I offer only this, in humility and gratitude to my Divine Self: I am willing to let the Peace of God be what it is, and I accept myself as I am meant to be.

Reflection

Why do I need to prepare my mind for PeaceIsn’t my mind ready for Peace?

If your mind were ready for Peace, you would have It. Do you have It? If you had It, you would not be asking this question. You already are Peace, fully and completely. When you Know this, all questions will subside. In the meantime, you are preparing your mind for full Knowledge. There is still a part of your mind that does not accept the reality of its own complete Peace. You nudge it along with your commitment to It.

And I commit to it by preparing my mind to recognize that it wants It…above all else?

Yes. You need to decide how much you want It. When you want it fully and completely, you will Know It, fully and completely. In the meantime, you vacillate. Your commitment is strong some days and weak other days; your experience of Peace is correspondingly strong some days and weak other days. It can not enter where It is not invited. You must invite It and when It comes, recognize It when it arrives, welcome It, treat It as an honored guest, and go out of your way to show your appreciation for It. This is what you would do for anything you want above all else, no?

That is why I offer it gratitude in humility? Because It has given me what I want, above all else? 

You are thanking your Self for your Self. You are the giver and the receiver. You are the Peace you seek; you are the Peace you find. You are the Truth you seek; you are the Truth you find. You are what you want, above all else. The gratitude is “simply” acknowledging (the recognizing) that the only gift you have, need, or want, you already possess.

“Accepting myself as I am meant to be?”

Of course. You see.

 

 

Nothing But: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 05

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

I am now aware of my complete harmony with All of Life. I choose to carry the harmony of Oneness with me in all areas of my life. Awareness of Oneness brings immediate peace to all my relationships and interactions. I choose Peace. I choose recognizing Unity with All. I choose Oneness with All.

Reflection

Nothing but Truth exists.

Nothing but Harmony exists.

Nothing but Oneness exists.

Nothing but Love exists.

If something is not True, it simply does not exist. This is the idea behind the philosophical/religious traditions that say “the world” is an illusion, known as “maya”. We are not perceiving Truth; we are perceiving the illusion; the illusion is not True; We must get beyond the illusion (beyond our ignorance of Truth), and Know (not perceive) Truth.

Existence is the first premise of Life. Descartes had it a bit backwards with his “I think, therefore I am”, if we understand this to signify that the comprehension of the existence precedes existence itself.  How can anything precede existence?

So, I exist.

The question is: how aware am I of my own existence?

If I am aware of all my (individual) existence, then I am aware of all existence, because Truth is the first premise of existence, therefore of Life.

To know existence is to know Truth. To Know Truth is to Know Love, Oneness, Harmony. There is no Knowing “just one part” of existence. Full Knowing Knows All.

But I do not Know. I reside in the world, in perception, in illusion, in ignorance.

If I were now aware of my complete harmony with All of Life, that completeness would open the door to all completeness.

In A Course in Miracles, Jesus says, “There is nothing about me that you cannot attain. I have nothing that does not come from God. The difference between us now is that I have nothing else. This leaves me in a state which is only potential in you.”

Jesus Knows the Truth of existence.

Knowing Truth is potential in me.

Until I Know, I am happy to continue to choose Harmony, Oneness, Unity, Peace in each and every moment. The more repetition and practice that I have of being aware of Truth, the closer I get to being aware of the completeness of Truth.

 

 

 

Outside Myself: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 04

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

I am fulfilled! I am filled to the utmost capacity! I embody All that Is. I am beyond complete! I accept and receive the beautiful gift of Life, and Know the perfection of the Love I Am. In gratitude I share this Love with All that Is.

Reflection

The overarching theme for the day is feeling alienated, disconnected. That’s almost funny, isn’t it? Considering being connected is an idea inherent in the Guiding Thought, though it’s not stated explicitly (what else could “embodying All that Is” mean?).

I felt like I did not understand the Guiding Thought today. I felt my mind was dull and almost bored. Don’t misunderstand: I held engagement with the Guiding Thought for over 5 minutes: my mind didn’t wander, I was focused…but everything was dull, like I had taken a numbing drug prior to starting (which I did not do…).

I felt like there was a part of me that did understand the Guiding Thought, “completely”. Yet, at the same time, my brain did not feel like it was sparking with understanding.

I feel as though I could try to think harder about it, try to do my logical-sequencing, but since my mind feels dull, I have no motivation to do that.

Neither did I feel clear at all about how I understood the GT. I knew that I should understand it, that I have understood it, but today, it just wasn’t there.

Because there was a part of me that does understand it, it was as though I could see what I was missing, but could not access it. There was a Knowing “I” watching “me”, watching me feel numb and dull. “I” was aware of this Knowing “I”, which I think made it more difficult, because “I” knew that I Know it, but could not step into the Knowing.

Have you ever read Flowers for Algernon? It’s about a man with a low IQ who is given surgery to increase his IQ. With his new intelligence, he becomes a new person. He has lively conversations, wonderful conversations, becomes a socialite; there is a love story…but alas, the effects of the surgery wear off and he slowly slips back to being a dullard. At the end, it becomes clear that he remembers who he was during the time of the experiment, but he also fully understands that he cannot access it.

That’s how I feel today: my brilliance has faded and I cannot access it. Fortunately, I have faith my brilliance will return! These things (seeming set backs) are always temporary.

 

 

The Effect of Accepting Freedom as a Natural State: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 03

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

In my natural state of Freedom, my mind knows only serene tranquility and Oneness with All. Nothing need be done, for there is no more to do. I am perfect, whole, and complete. Satisfied and filled full, my energy overflows to manifest only the Good, the Holy, and the Beautiful.

Reflection

I spent my contemplation time unpacking this Guiding Thought:

First, it sets forth an unquestioned premise right off the bat, namely that Freedom is my natural state. It does not say “if Freedom is my natural state…”  It simply presupposes Freedom as my natural state as a fact.

I am not saying I disagree; I did just complete Journey of Freedom, so my consciousness is primed to accept the idea. For those of you who are not yet ready to be told, unquestionably, that Freedom is your natural state, simply make the first sentence an if-then statement: If my natural state is Freedom, then my mind knows only serene tranquility and Oneness with All. Doing this may reduce any resistance you have to being told to accept an idea, and maybe feeling like there is no choice in the matter.

do accept the premise as stated, and I can also accept that in Freedom there is only tranquility and Oneness. I cannot say I have personal experience of this; however, I can imagine these three feelings, Freedom, tranquility, and Oneness, absolutely going hand-in-hand.

Imagining a concept counts.

From this, after reaching a state of pure Freedom, I can also imagine that there is nothing more to be done, but hang out in blissful tranquility.

There is a part of me that feels relieved with this realization. I can feel a part of me thinking, oh, thank God! I am so tired and weary; I work so hard; this energy in the third dimension is so heavy; I am thankful to hear that there will come a time, when I no longer have to think about everything that is mine to  do. 

But then just when I get hooked on the idea of hanging out in blissful tranquility, the Guiding Thought brings it right back down to earth: I am perfect, whole, and complete.

You know what that means, right? Now. Here. Not some time in the future, “When there is nothing more to be done”. No. It’s here, now. Which means, I need to open my mind to being perfect, whole, and complete, instead of denying the reality of who I am now. (Which is, btw, what these Journeys are all about…in case you didn’t catch that…)

So, what that means is that here, now I am also satisfied and filled full.

Here was the big realization I had today: Only when I am satisfied and filled full,  does my energy overflow to create the Good, the Holy, and the Beautiful.

Only when.

And that makes perfect sense to me. If I am running around chasing after things (including ideas or self-conceptions) to satisfy or fulfill me, then all of my energy is being expended to get something, instead of going into the beauty of creation.

If I realize I already am satisfied and fulfilled, why should I be running around? Why expend any energy on anything else, but the Good, the Holy, and the Beautiful? Nothing else need be done.

If I stop and breathe, and realize the truth of who I am (my natural state of Freedom and being perfect, whole, and complete, and all that), then all that is left to do is to create from that place of Truth (which is Good, Holy, and Beautiful). All that is left is to express the Love that is me, in gratitude for Its Being.

This is one of those days, where I can see where I am headed, but the path feels overgrown with thickets or strewn with lots of rocks, because even though I can see it, I don’t quite know how to get through it. How do I get to that point of being so completely Free, that I am in complete tranquility, where nothing need be done, and that all I have to do is thank Life for Itself?

Remedying a Cleansing Reaction: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 02

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

Knowing myself as Peace fortifies my inner awareness of the unity within. Through gratitude for the Life I Am, I connect with harmony. Through harmony, I am restored and strengthened, and am thus able to carry my Inner Peace to all of life’s activity surrounding me.

Reflection

First, let me say, that even though I have been doing these Journeys for several years, and a lot of the early doubt, skepticism, and fear don’t show up so much, I still feel the effects of my own resistance to expanding my consciousness.

It’s like a cleansing reaction: when toxic stuff has come in (to the body/mind/emotions), when those toxins are released, they cause toxic symptoms. Even though the toxins are releasing, it can look/feel like dis-ease. It is a skill of awareness of your own body/mind/emotions to know if your response (mental/physical/emotional) is one of release, or of a toxin digging in deeper.

I had a toxic release last night. I felt non-specific panic, anxiety, and fear, about nothing in particular. I know it was a release, and not a digging in deeper, because a) I am pretty self aware b) I’ve been doing the Journeys long enough that I know they “trigger” my stuff c) it was non-specific and about nothing in particular. All I could think was, “Yup, the Journey has begun”.

This is also a sign of growing pains, so I consider it very beneficial. Essentially, what happens is these Guiding Thoughts challenge the lower mind, and ask it to consider new ideas, new concepts…maybe even grow, and evolve. The lower mind can feel attacked with these new ideas; it can feel inadequate or unsafe: what if I’m not good enough? What if these new ideas take over? What if I disappear, die? 

The lower mind responds through these fears, which for me came out as non-specific panic, anxiety, and fear.

Recognition, awareness, and patience to get through it without being pulled into the feelings are key:

  • If you think you are having a cleansing reaction, breathe (having someone who loves you to tell you “breathe!” really helps).
  • Observe the feelings: where do you experience a corresponding discomfort in your body? Ask yourself specifically, “What is this?” Name it, if you can; that takes some of it’s power away. “I feel trapped.” “I feel threatened.” “I feel disconnected.”
  • Ask yourself what other feelings are related to this feeling. Often, feelings act in layers. For example, feeling betrayed is often connected to feeling let down, not-heard, bitter, seething, etc. Uncover as many of those as you can.
  • Ask yourself, “Where did this come from?” Go back as far as you can, even to the very, very first time you ever felt the feeling you are feeling–even into your childhood. This, too, takes some of the power away: this may be my past, not my present. If it is my past, it does not exist now.
  • Remind yourself of the truth of who you are: I am not this feeling. I am perfect, whole, and complete. This feeling passes through me; I can watch it flow in and out. I experience this feeling, but I do not need to identify with it. Love and only Love is the Truth of who I am.
  • Then, love your feeling. Transform the feeling into harmony with Love (see yesterday’s Guiding Thought). Eventually, the feeling will harmonize with your Love, and you will be restored and strengthened, and you will come full circle to Know your inner Peace.