I Am My Brothers’ Keeper: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 08

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

When I lift my vibration into Peace and Harmony, all are lifted with me. With this awareness comes great responsibility: I am a Peace steward of all humanity, of all Life. Eternal Peace is my natural state. I joyfully and easily share it with all, and fulfill my Divine Purpose in the world.

Reflection

I felt alternating desire for accomplishment, and fear of failure while reading the Guiding Thought.

On the one hand, I feel the gravity of being a Peace steward, and the enormity of the responsibility. And a part of me wants that; I want the responsibility.

A part of me seems to understand that the first two sentences are merely stating facts: this is how it is, don’t fight it; it’s just who you are. 

Yet a different part feels so much fear about the implications of that, the weight of responsibility, the fear of failure. How can do what needs to be done, in the job of being a Peace steward? This amount of responsibility must be “difficult”…

…but then, in the very next sentences, the Guiding Thought is assuring me of how naturally, easily, and joyfully I can accomplish it.

Further, not only does it declare how naturally, easily, and joyfully I am able to accomplish it, but that this is in fact my Divine Purpose.

It’s as though this Guiding thought is designed to raise a bunch of fear, then wipe it away by declaring that success is inevitable, fulfilling not just my will, but Divine Will, too.

 

Sorry, No Answers Today: Journey of Peace 2017– Day 07

Copyright Tam Black 2017
for susanwithpearls

Guiding Thought

The Peace of God is stronger than my self-constructed obstacles to it. I open my mind to holy communion with the Divine. Brought to union with God, obstacles crumble. Peace stands victorious. I am that Peace.

Reflection

I felt like I had a lot of self-constructed obstacles to Peace just reading the Guiding Thought today.

The more I contemplated, and tried to commune with the Divine and offer up my obstacles, the more I created obstacles. My obstacles were creating more obstacles, then those obstacles created obstacles. What a loop! Instead of “crumbling” and dissolving, each crumble became a head of a hydra and grew back 9 more obstacles.

Here are some examples:

I need to just relax. How do I relax? Open my mind How do I open my mindI am that Peace. How can I be Peace, when I haven’t figured out how to open my mind? The Peace of God is stronger than…If it’s stronger than these obstacles why do I have these obstacles? What is my mind doing? I know the answer is right here, right in front of my face. Why is it no working?

While all this was going on, there was a part of me that knew that I know, but that I was just not accessing it–very similar to a couple days ago.

In my conscious brain, I simply could not get further than the words. I had trouble feeling, and I had trouble understanding. But I also knew that I can understand, that I do understand.

The mind wants to make it difficult. the mind needs to be valued. So it does what it knows to do to be valuable.

It reminds me of those employees who create problems so they can “fix” them (so they have value), or the ones who nit pick about schedules (they have to have oversight, so they are “doing” something!), or the ones who make mountains out of molehills, to seem important, and “show” that they have really big ideas!

Funny how my mind’s antics can be seen in the “real” work-a-day world.

Maybe this is what my mind was showing me? maybe I need to recognize that the behavior I see outside of me, is the behavior inside of me.

While I was contemplating the Guiding Thought, I was also thinking: this is not difficult, I know how to do this. I’ve done this hundreds of times before.

What I was referring to was surrender. Letting go of self-created obstacles feels a lot like surrendering them at the alter of God, letting them go, asking for purification. I have worked a lot on surrender. Why did this day feel so difficult, so full of obstacles?

No answers today. Just more to contemplate. Oh, and don’t worry. I doabsolutely believe the Peace of God is stronger than this…even if I don’t understand it today.