We are light.
Our Bodies are light.
We are free.
We know fulfillment and can feel it rise within and expand out.
When I was a child, I had moments of knowing I was connected to something greater than myself. Today, with my adult brain, I would describe these moments as feelings of Oneness or Unity or Whole Love. At the time though, I was not thinking of it in quite that way—I was a kid; all I knew is it felt right, it felt like my body was in a current of flow that went on forever. I remember thinking, “I want to be light; I want my body to transform into light.” I think children in general have greater access to feeling “in the flow” than adults: they have not built up the emotional and mental barriers that get in the way of this flow.
One such moment for me was when I decided to try to meditate. I was probably 13 or 14, and had never been formally introduced to meditation or eastern philosophies. My sister was my biggest influence; she was reading the Seth books by Jane Roberts, the “Tao Te Ching” by Lao Tzu, and other such books and I, as the little sister, followed and wanted to know what these things were about. I read about Tao and flow, and consciousness and “reality”. There was something there I was learning, that was shifting something in me.
Somewhere, I don’t even really know where, I came across a description of meditation—upside down. It seemed as though the meditation posture was intended to be uncomfortable and since I come from a Catholic background, where pain is incorporated into the atonement of sins, it just made sense to me that meditation would be the same way. I had already had feelings—moments—of feeling the flow, and thought meditation would help me figure out how to do it more often, so I tried it. My head on a pillow, up against a wall in my bedroom, I did a headstand. I had not read any “instructions”, any pointers, or any warnings of “don’t try this at home.” In other words: I did not know what I was doing! But I knew what I wanted to achieve. I closed my eyes and sat (stood?) there… And sat there… And sat there… I may have passed out. I may have fallen asleep. I don’t know…but I knew when I “woke up” (returned to consciousness; re-entered my body?) that I had succeeded! I was so calm, peaceful, and happy. My body hurt like heck, but that to me was just a symbol of the success—I achieved surpassing the bodily aches and was totally absorbed in the flow of the mind—and I had done it intentionally.
I have been practicing and learning to cultivate that feeling of lightness ever since. The effects are the overwhelming feelings of being in a flow, of clarity, of love, peace, wholeness, completion, trust, and happiness (not always all at the same time). In a broader sense, the feeling is connected to a very solid, practical, purposeful goal, applicable to life. I noticed that when practiced and pursued consciously, the effects slowly expanded, making life’s activities, relationships, and choices clearer, more peaceful, more gentle.
When there is intention and flow to the practice, life-activities have a “flow” to them.
I now know that it is the continual cultivation and intention that allows those moments into experience, because transcendence does not just arrive, it must pursued, invited, and welcomed. We are all capable of transcendence.
Ways to support this work:
- Hire me as your Spiritual Coach, you may sign up for a personalized Journey with me Click here for more information. Or I offer 1-on-1 spiritual coaching sessions. This is non-religion specific, and open to everyone, even atheists, though of course we would call something like “self-analysis coach” for a self-identified atheist.
- Indulge in one of my healing services: Jharra, Reiki, Fire Ceremony (see withpearls.com for more information).
- Send me a monetary gift via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier (please note “gift” in the transaction).
- Tell a friend about this site, the coaching or healing services.
- Invite me to interview on a podcast or for an article.
All proceeds go toward increasing love, light, and a consciousness of Oneness in the world. Thank you for your contribution that benefits All.
These Journeys are always available on this site at no charge. I also provide Jharra, Reiki, and Fire Ceremonies at no-charge to those who ask.