A Very Large Me–Journey of Creation 02.11.16

Guiding Thought

When your mind and will are free, they recognize only Truth. Your mind and will are free in the Knowledge of Union with Perfect Love. When you are in the state of One Mind and Will of Perfect Love, you  create Freedom and Truth for yourself and All.

Reflection / Contemplation

Clouds surround me as I move toward my time with Beloved. They are personal clouds of confusion, insecurity, and doubt. They are so thick and heavy this morning, my biggest gratitude is that I have the muscle memory that can carry me to my destination without much effort.

Within a few breaths, I am here and Beloved is present. My tears flow. Beloved is in Union with Perfect Love. In his presence, the frequency of the lower energies I brought in don’t exist.

The tears wash me clean and help calibrate me to this now moment.

A bell is tolling in the distance. My first thought is to let freedom ring!

I’m settling into to this reality as if I have just awoken from a bad dream. I know what had me so shaken wasn’t real. How can it seem so real that my physiology responds to mere thoughts?

Beloved begins to laugh. The sound comes in and begins tickling the corners of my mouth into a smile. Then the bubble of joy rises up from the depths and builds until I am belly laughing! Tears are streaming and my belly hurts as the shrieks of hilarity begin to quiet.

I have taken the full roller coaster ride of emotions!

My body feels light. A slight buzzing in my heart, head and hands. The clouds are nowhere in sight.

Beloved begins to share the guiding thought for today. Compassion supports me to stay out of self recriminations. The deadly loop of losing sight of Truth, then awakening then going instantly to blame, then back to darkness–all self inflicted.

Truth doesn’t go anywhere. It surrounds my self-imposed prison where I may have shut the gate, yet the lock is on the inside! I am the keeper of this dark kingdom. What continues to draw me in? Today I will experiment with dismantling the gate. In a world full of people, ideas, and activities, I sometimes lose contact with Me. It isn’t a quick disappearance, more of an almost unrecognizable slipping away. Each time I begin the rescue, I encounter the grief, yet not today. What I feel is the strength of Perfect Love. The clarity of It, the sureness that permeates. No hint of impatience. I am in Union with Perfect Love.

This is Truth. My heart and mind are in agreement on that. They seem to be communicating that this morning, they made the choice to play some old tapes. Run a few old programs for fun…forgetting that those programs aren’t fun, they are Life sucking.

Breathing in I call those old programs forward. They take the shape of the prison gate.

Forgiveness comes in a saturating mist. Holy water washes clean and dissolves the form. Light finishes the job until no trace remains.

A Great Sun moves from the beyond. It’s steady movement makes its way into my heart. I watch as that large ball of fire comes into the cave of my Heart Universe. It is brilliantly lit up and now reveals my Creation story that is depicted on the paintings inside this cave. This Sun is my creator, Perfect Love. I see the beginning of time and the Golden Age of pure Love and Creation. I follow the storyline and learn of the Dark Age where I lost sight of my Source. I’m awakening deeper into the memory of my true heritage. My ancestors were free in mind and heart and recognized only Truth. They were free in the Knowledge of Union with Perfect Love.

That Truth is My Truth. Getting out of the cloud bank only requires my remembrance. The last picture I see is that of A very large Me. The ball of Light is in my center, Light beams stretch from me out into the Universe of Life. I step closer and see that inside of this large depiction of Me are All Beings. I stare at it and feel a Joy that knows no opposite. I invite Beloved to interpret this for me. “Dear One,” he begins, “When you are in the state of One Mind and Will of Perfect Love you create Freedom and Truth for yourself and All.”

I place my hands gently over my heart and breathe as I speak, “I am free. I am free. I am free.”

 

Guest Contributor Amy Castillo

Amy Castillo. In the yurt with two grand babies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Creation (June 20 – August 08) is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

 

 

Lessons from a Dark Room –Journey of Creation 02.11.15

Guiding Thought

Perfect Love, the Source and Truth of your Self, imbues you with the will to create with Love. You are able to create through your own free will, extending Perfect Love.  Loving creation was given freely to you; therefore, give freely of your own loving creation. Joyfully create through Perfect Love, with Perfect Love, as Perfect Love.

Reflection / Contemplation

Beloved and I will meet in the yurt today.

My entry in is going to be a singing bowl session. I’m laying in the middle of this circular space, feeling cradled in the center of my universe. The bowls-metal and crystal surround me. I hear the faint sound of chimes and realize Beloved is getting closer.

Closing my eyes and drawing in slow, intentional breaths begins the ascent. Hearing Beloved enter, I intentionally soften my heart and mind to open even more deeply. As the bowls begin to play my body aligns to the frequency of Love. It has no opposite, yet the obstacles my small self has built from fear are the waste to be dismantled.

I am now but a sound wave myself. Perfect Love has taken form as a Goddess. She quietly takes my hand and we enter the bedroom from my childhood. I am in bed, eyes open, terrified of the dark. My child self is listing all the possible dangers that the dark holds. She seems to believe it will keep her safe if she can figure it all out.

My heart aches a little bit. I can remember how much the dark scared me and for how long. I didn’t like sleepovers because I wasn’t familiar with their dark and seemed to have to start a whole new fear list!

The Goddess is with my child self. She is creating a sound, as if from inside of her, that soothes. As my child-self relaxes, the thick energy of fear dissipates and her eyes close.

I have Deja vue! Seeing it encourages my mind to remember that I am always in Perfect Love’s embrace. I would wake up attuned to Love, yet at night I would be too preoccupied with fear-thoughts to remember.

As I watch this child aspect of me sleep peacefully I am also able to see that there is not a monster under my bed or in my closet. The dark holds nothing but the temporary absence of light. Dark holds no special evil powers and it is not active.

When I open a door to a dark room it does not come out like the light does; if I am in a lighted hallway and open a door to a dark room, the light rushes in!

Light is active! Perfect Love is the Source and Truth of my Self. Seeing how I planned to survive the night by creating through fear as a child begs me to evaluate where I am still engaging with fear in this way.

Loving creation is active, potent, and All that is real. Where is my small self still clinging to the practice of protecting herself with negative lists of what ifs?

Is my free will to create/extend Perfect Love blocked by my small self’s attempt to keep herself safe?

The Goddess has her radiant hands on my shoulders, the warmth is incredible. She leans her forehead to mine and instantly I see a beautiful garden path. There is a quality to the air that has soothing sound carried in it and color everywhere! In my inhale I am breathing in Perfect Love. My exhale gently carries out what doesn’t serve me. We move along the path in this glorious breath pattern until we reach a pond. I look into and see what appears to be me-yet also another larger aspect of me-like nesting dolls-one inside the other. I see the connection of my self and True Self visibly. All together we are a giant beacon of Light. A sign appears at the edge of the pond or I am just now aware of it. It reads “clarity pool”. I am seeing the Truth in Light. Perfect Love is me, as me! We are in One being. Creating in Perfect Love is my natural state. The harmony and accord of this garden helps me to see and feel the Truth that has always been, always will be. The chimes are sounding and I feel a gentle pull through the air. The Sacred Joy of this garden is what I ingest with each breath as it disappears from visual sight. My Self has taken the helm! She is who returns to the yurt. She knows that creating in, as, and with Perfect Love is her Will. The frequency She emits is in resonance with this. My small self is relaxed and at the moment, grateful for Truth to lead the way.

 

Guest Contributor Amy Castillo

Amy Castillo. In the yurt with two grand babies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Creation (June 20 – August 08) is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!