Not Warm and Fuzzy –Journey of Freedom 02.12.21

Welcome to day 21, the first day of Round 3! How are you doing? How’s your brain holding up, maintaining a daily focus on Freedom? In the third round, the subject of the Guiding Thought is “we”. This is the “unifying round”. I am not just I, you are not just you. We are we, together, all One. Think of this as “society” or a social complex, if that fits for you; “we” are a collective of people. I cannot be in this by myself or for myself; I can only be with you and for you, equal to myself. This round serves to expand your notion of “I” and “you” into this unity of “we”.

Guiding Thought

Love is our natural state; In Love we remember who we truly are; we remember our holiness, our innocence, and our infinity. Love enlightens our minds and lifts our hearts. We feel buoyant and expansive! We are now aware of our Self as Infinite Love, unbounded and free.

Reflection / Contemplation

I have to come clean: I haven’t done a very good job sharing my frame of mind on this Journey. I’ve been doing the Journey, and outwardly the appearance is (I presume) that “all is well”–which it is, yet there are also things further underneath the surface that I have not shared. One of the big reasons I began sharing these Journeys publicly was to show, to demonstrate, the day-to-day process of shifting one’s consciousness, of progressing on the path. I want people to see that lifting one’s consciousness into higher levels of love, light, and Being is not always linear, it’s not always “fun”, it’s not just warm and fuzzy all the time. Doing this work is work. It’s work that cultivates the strength, courage, tenacity, and skills to do more of the work–and doing more of the work means having stuff come up to deal with in deeper/higher ways.

 

Recently, I have not been experiencing seriously f’d up shit–but certainly over the past 6 years of doing the Journeys I have. Sometimes I look back on things I have experienced and wonder how I made it through…but I didn’t just “make it through”…I made it through free of attachments or “negative” emotions. I am bouyant and expansive–and I owe it to doing this work (and a supportive relationship, and the Jharra, and the Havan, and prayers, and the Grace of God…).

That was all just a long preamble to my coming clean. Here is what’s going on beneath the surface for me while doing this Journey: I have not felt like I am focused on Freedom at all. My mind feels all over the place, everywhere except freedom. It feels like Freedom is too big for me to handle right now, so I am working on something much smaller, something I can handle, a much smaller “bite”.

But I am not sure what that bite is. It’s not like there is a focus, a theme, or a script. I am just doing the Journey as best I can, thinking about Freedom as best I can, and doing my best to notice, to be aware of what’s going on within me and around me.

I feel pretty certain that All is well. But I also feel a bit unanchored, “loose”, untethered, not understanding how pieces fit together. I don’t know where I’m going. Neither are these unusual or foreign feelings on a Journey–I just haven’t been telling you about them on this Journey.

I do know that the Journeys always get me to the right place–the next step for the evolution of my consciousness for it/me to progress further/higher/deeper.  It’s not “fun”, but I do love the work, and I love the anticipation of seeing where I’ll be “next”.

Peace to you. I am glad you are here. Thank you for the work that you are doing.

 

Journey of Freedom (August 11 – October 01) is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I have provided the Journeys free of charge since 2013. If you would like to contribute to site maintenance and administration costs, I accept donations and gifts via PayPal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

For information on Jharra, please see withpearls.com/jharra

For information on the Haidakhan Fire Ceremony, please see withpearls.com/havan

 

 

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