Intangible and Infinite: Journey of Worth – 03.03.04

Guiding Thought

My worth is inestimable, beyond compare!

I always know I have everything to give—thus, I may always give freely! I know my worth, I give it; I give freely, and I Know in the giving!

As I give, I learn, allowing Joy and Peace to lead and to guide me. I follow willingly for I know: Where there is Joy and Peace, there is Love; where there is Love, I Am; where I Am, I am giving my inestimable worth.

The Guiding Thoughts audio for this Journey may be found here.

Reflection

It’s hard to think about/imagine my worth being “inestimable”.

I am so conditioned to think of worth or value in finite terms, like dollars or tasks that I am able to accomplish, or tangible things that I have to give.

What is this “inestimable”?

I can think/imagine that I know I have everything to give…isn’t that like being a child of the Universe, with all opulence my birthright? This is not a foreign concept, though it’s a totally different thing to know I have everything to give. Where do I start? To whom do I give? What do I give?

I feel like in this case giving has more to do with an attitude of giving, rather than the actual giving of anything…

Or does it?

There I am again, in my pre-conditioned framework that what I have to give must be tangible, and measured in finite terms.

What if what I have to give is intangible and infinite?

What is it like to give what is intangible, and if it’s intangible, how do I know I am giving it?

Again, I think it’s a matter of attitude. If I can get into the feeling of giving, and the feeling of being able to give infinitely of whatever I have, a kind word, a smile, a loving thought, and if I can do that for more and more moments, more and more instances in each day…then I am headed toward learning to give my inestimable worth!

*Mistakes Happen: I accidentally did day 05 yesterday instead of day 04. So, these two days are swapped in order. I hope I did not confuse anyone too much!

 

If you are curious here’s my writing from The very first Journey of Worth, seven, years ago Day 04.  

 

Direct the Mind: Journey of Worth – 03.03.05

Guiding Thought

There is only one Will. That Will is Love: your Love, my Love, our Love, together. Only when I will in Love is the outcome assured in Love. Only when I will in Love do I know the results are truly beneficial to all, including myself. Only when I will with Love am I Free, and I affirm with certainty “All is as it should be”.

The Guiding Thoughts audio for this Journey may be found here.

Reflection

Here it is again. Same idea as yesterday: One Vibration, One Will.

“i” must will with THE Will. “i” must use my free will to choose THE Will.

Not because that Will cares what I choose, but because It is the ONLY Will (Love).

In fact, I cannot choose anything other than that Will; nothing else exists.

But I can think that I can choose against the One Will (my mind wants to think it has control). Then I experience something other than Love’s Will. Until I direct my mind to choose the One Will, it will–by default–choose its own will. This is why I must use my free will to make the choice; I must be the one to decide what I want, and tell my mind how I want to use it.

This is the best use of free will: Choose Love.

If you are curious here’s my writing from The very first Journey of Worth, seven, years ago Day 05.  

 

 

Self Seeking Self: Journey of Worth – 03.03.03

Guiding Thought

I know my Self when I share my Self. As I give my Self, I see my Source returned to me. All that is Whole, all that is Beauty, all that is Holy, reflects back to me in the Joy of Being, in the brilliance of Life, in the Unity of Self. I choose to share only the Self of Beauty, Wholeness, and Joy, that I may Know my Self as Beauty, Wholeness, and Joy.

The Guiding Thoughts audio for this Journey may be found here.

Reflection

Who am I?

Am I myself, or am I my Self? Or both? Or neither (in Oneness, how is there a self at all?)?

In Sanskrit, this query is expressed as “Ham So”. Am I? The response is “So Ham”, I Am. When consciousness is externalized (as myself [lower case s, externalizing as the personality], the vibration is Ham Sa. When it is internalized (my Self, focused on the Higher [Divine] Self), the same vibration is SoHam.

It’s the same vibration, just depends on the direction.

This means that myself and my Self are the same vibration. This is why I can know my Self when I share my Self–I am bringing the inner to the outer. But also, this would mean that as soon as I share my Self (that is, when I externalize it), it’s actually myself (personality). And that would mean that even my personality-self is my Self, the Divine Self, the Inner Self, the Self that is fully aware of itself as Wholeness, Beauty, Joy…

Life is just a process of giving/sharing the same stuff–Source, Love, Divine Substance. Once I give it–bring it from Inner to Outer, then I can see it, feel it, touch it, and experience it. And also, as soon as I do this, and interact with It via experience, It gives back to me.

This is why I would want only to give Beauty, Wholeness, and Joy. This is not only what I want to experience, but also what I want returned to me.

Here is a beautiful mantra that expresses this, “Hamsa. So Ham. Ekam.” “Am I? I Am. ONE. “

There’s a Land that I See, Where the Children are Free: Journey of Worth – 03.03.02

Guiding Thought

I love myself for the Truth within me. The Truth within me Knows me for who I am—Pure Love, Only Love, beyond all valuing of the world. In Love all are equal, for we are One. This is how Truth Knows me—Pure, One, and Free. This is my Truth; this is our Truth; this is the Self I love.

The Guiding Thoughts audio for this Journey may be found here.

Reflection

In my experience with the Journeys, there are three “levels” (so far, that I’ve discovered) that the consciousness can express in learning to Be the Divinity that We Are, that I Am.

  1. The first level is the digging up and rooting out that I mentioned in my Why?At this level, there can be a lot of doubt, uncertainty and resistance because this level involves finding and facing perhaps uncomfortable thought patterns that were possibly associated with “lower”, “fear-shame-guilt-grief-anger-selfish” feelings and behaviors. I mean…who wants to look at that stuff and admit that it is or was part of a personal identity? Who–especially those on a higher path–wants to admit to anything about the existence or pre-existence of a lower-self? At this level, there are three things that are really important:
    1. Let it out. Face it. Bring it to the surface to be healed/transmuted. It doesn’t “just go away”. You need to escort it out, and you need to do that by choosing to, and then doing it.
    2. Practice gentleness and non-judgement. There have been times in my past when I have been very cold, uncaring, and hurtful. I have intuitive memories of previous lives when I have been a downright “bad” person. If you believe that the core of who we are is a unique energy signature/frequency/vibration, and that that unique energy signature continues through what we call lifetimes, then it stands to reason that we have all had hundreds, thousands, maybe millions or billions of these lifetimes. We have tried each end of the “good-bad” spectrum and everywhere in-between. At this level, it’s not about judgement or guilt, it’s about learning and living by choice– do you want to be “good” or “bad”? Make the choice, claim it, live it.
    3. Keep going. The only way out is through.
  2. At this level, there is not so much digging and rooting, but there is still facing, which is making the choice. At this level, there may still feel like there is an option to choose something other than being your Divine Self. You are only ever your Divine Self. That is the Choice. But since we live in a free-will world, YOU must choose it, consciously, willingly, preferably joyfully and gratefully. So at this level, you are practicing choosing, breaking the habits of the lower-self, and experiencing lots of nuanced situations where you need to decide, listening with the guidance of your heart: Do I want to act as my lower self, or do I want to act as my Higher Self? This level can feel like a lot of work; it can also require a lot of faith: that the choice you make today matters to who you are becoming. The more often you choose to act as your Higher Self, though, the easier it gets.
  3. This is the level of pay off from the work done at level two. Once you begin to choose to act as your Higher Self more and more often, and the easier it becomes, this is the level of realizing the Truth of Who You Are–having an experiential understanding that you really are your Divine Self. You really are not the stories you have been told about who you are; you are not your past; you are not the emotions that flow through you; you are Harmony, Love, Justice, Peace, Abundance, and all those qualities that describe the Divine. And you believe it, and Know it, and want to live it more and more.

There will be different reactions to the Guiding Thoughts at all three levels. For example, someone at level one, may not love themselves very much, and so may have a strong (“negative”) response to the words, “I love myself”. But even that can be overcome by acknowledging that there is a Truth within. And even if someone does not currently love themselves, they can accede to loving themselves for the Truth within. Especially if that Truth within Knows them  only with and as Pure Love.

Maybe if Pure Love can love them, they can begin to love themselves. and then make choices to do that more often. Then to actually believe it and live it.

Let’s get to that place together, all of us believing and living our existence as Pure Love, One, and Free.

 

 

Let the Unfoldment begin! : Journey of Worth – 03.03.01

Guiding Thought

I have forgotten my Self. I have forgotten who I am. I have forgotten that I was established in Love and by Love, which is infinite and eternal; therefore, my worth is infinite and eternal.

I seek to remember my Self. I choose to remember my Self.

I choose to remember who I am and my infinite worth in Love.

I choose to be aware, to understand, and to Know myself (my Self) as the Love I am.

I choose to share who I am with the world, giving my infinite worth, measured in infinite Love.

The Guiding Thoughts audio for this Journey may be found here.
[It appears I am having some technical difficulties in getting the audio to play. hopefully this will be resolved tommorrow!]

Reflection

Not much of the Guiding Thought got in today. My brain seems to be working okay, but not at optimal processing, and this is the first Journey in a long time that I am reading and contemplating the Guiding Thoughts rather than listening and drawing. There is definitely different brain-functions between these two modes. I highly recommend you explore both for yourself.

A part of me is very excited to be back to contemplating/writing. It wants to think deeply, but I can tell it’s a bit rusty.

And that’s good, because it’s like getting a fresh start.

I am reminded of dear Steve’s writing from Journey of Purpose:

Goodness is our original nature. Buddhists say we exist before we are born. I like the term beginners mind, sometimes referred to as a void or blankness, where all things are possible. “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few”. (Shunryu Suzuki, from Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind).  Beginner’s mind is limitless and ready for anything. It is this purity that allows me to experience life, as it is. An empty cup can be filled, a full cup cannot. Thus I let go of pre-conceived notions of how life should be, and allow my Divine Mind to express through my activities in this world. (emphasis mine)

The one thing that tweaked my brain today was this, “giving my infinite worth, measured in infinite Love”.

When I read that  I thought, “I am so far from that. I would not even know where to begin in the how to give my infinite worth, much less measure it”.

I feel like a child, a neophyte, a beginner; like I am at square one, not knowing what I am doing, where I am going–and in some regards even–how I got here, or what I want.

What am I doing, and why?

Don’t worry. Answers come. Day by day, thought by thought. Bit by bit, drop by drop.

Let the Unfoldment begin!

If you are curious here’s my writing from The very first Journey of Worth, seven, years ago Day 01.  

 

 

Commitment and Dedication: Journey of Worth – 03.03.00

Today, for the first time, I am including a Statement of Freedom, in addition to the Commitment and Dedication. This statement is a declaration of Absolute choice that I will no longer accept any limiting beliefs that have hindered, distorted, or obstructed the full embrace of Worth in/of my Divine Self. If it feels right to you, copy what I have below, then modify/edit it to suit your voice.

Statement of Freedom

On This day, April 25, 2020, I cease believing in my value and worth defined as anything that is limiting, distorted, or less than the Perfection of the Divine Being I AM, including, but not limited to:

  1. Feeling unsatisfied and impatient; that something is missing, and that I do not feel like I am whole, or enough.
  2. Young-Catholic-student images and memories of being treated “less than” and “not worthy”.
  3. Mother-issues about how “worthy” I was(n’t).
  4. Material comfort, taking care of others, and/or providing financial support to others, and feelings of “this is (the only time) when I am worthy (in other words, if I were not needed for my money, or my care-giving, I would not have any value).

I now choose to view the world of effect as it truly is: simply an out-picturing of my former beliefs. I believed in value or worth as something other than my Divine Self, therefore I surrendered my god-given power and authority to an objectified belief. I believed in the possibility of being less than or not good enough, thus causing a separation in my consciousness from the Truth of my Being. I believed in the human mind and material conditions and through the energy and attention of those thoughts, I gave humans and material conditions power over me. I believed in the collective-conscious-created illusion of error thoughts which express  value and worth in ways less than the Divine, and in doing so I have limited the unlimited. No more! On this day, I renounce my so-called humanhood and claim my Divine inheritance as my Divine Self, the I AM that I am. This day, I acknowledge God and only God as True Value, True Worth, and the only “thing” worthy of my thought, energy, attention, gratitude, and service.

Commitment Statement

Today I commit to being aware, to understanding, and to knowing my Divine Nature, my Self of Infinite Love and Oneness, as the Source and Substance that animates my mind and body, and governs all of my Life and affairs. Today, and for this Journey, I commit to focusing my mind and heart on my own Divine Self, my True Nature. I deny the prodding of my lower mind which would have me believe I am less than I am, that I am separate and alone. I place my faith in Infinite Love and claim my authority over financial and material situations, interactions, and affairs in all areas of my experience.

I commit to contemplating the Guiding Thoughts for a minimum of five minutes each day, then writing an response for a minimum of five minutes each day.

Statement of Dedication

I dedicate any and all good that may result from this Journey of Worth to the benefit and enlightenment of all sentient beings. May we all Know our Selves together in Love.

 

Why: Journey of Worth – 03.03.0

When you start any journey, you first do some things to get ready–like think about where you want to go, and how you might want to get there. The first two days of the WithPearls Consciousness Journeys are the preparation days: you set the tone, and prepare your mind for what you want to encounter and/or where you’d like to end up on this Journey. This day is like looking at the topography map of your mind, to plan for your Journey.

Today begin to think about why a Journey of Worth may be important. Today is not a day for answers; it’s a day for looking at what might be sought after, what might be achieved, and why those things might be important. This is the setting up the intention day.

Why?

If I had begun this Journey as scheduled, on April 16, my Why would have been very weak:
“Because this is just what I do…” (hear the complacent tone).
“Because it’s the next Journey, and I have to do it (because I have previously committed to it)…” (hear the slightly resentful, exasperated tone).
“Because now that I have a new direction for my Purpose, I need to find my worth in that…” (hear the obviousness and  lack of thought in that).

Really, I had not been able to come up with a real reason for myself about why Journey of Worth mattered at this time. Sometimes, I think I have worked through so much crap and embraced so much of my Higher Self that I should be done already, and on the other hand, that very thought tells me I have a long way to go (is this a new form of resistance?).

Delaying the first day of the Journey provided me with an opportunity to figure out that I need to get myself in gear and get working again.

I did some process exercise-questions to help me dig deep into why I really need to be serious about doing Journey of Worth. Some of the answers I came up with surprised me, and made me realize I still have crap to deal with.

“Your task is not to seek for love,
but merely to seek and find
all the barriers within yourself
that you have built against it.”

It occurred to me (yet again), that the Journey is never-ending, that I am the only one responsible for finding and rooting out the limitations, obstacles, and barriers that (I and only I) have built against being the Love I AM.

It’s spring, and I’ve been gardening. Rooting out has a literal feel and sense to it for me now. Digging deeply. This is my work. It’s up to me.

So…the things that surprised me when I did the process-exercise-questions were:

  1. I feel unsatisfied and impatient; that something is missing, and that I do not feel like I am whole, or enough.
  2. When I looked at when and how I learned about my worthiness, I realized that I still have some young-Catholic-student issues to deal with. One of the nuns at my school was quite mean, and she took it out on me sometimes (I’m sure I was not the only one, but I wouldn’t have known that then). I don’t feel emotionally scarred or anything, but I definitely had some images and memories of being treated “less than” and “not worthy”.
  3. Similarly, I found some mother-issues about how “worthy” I was(n’t).
  4. The process-questions then turned to getting at when and how I feel worthy. I was surprised when a lot of my responses had to do with material comfort, taking care of others, and providing financial support to others. The feeling was, this is (the only time) when I am worthy. In other words, if I were not needed for my money, or my care-giving, I would not have any value.

Where did all this come from? How is it possible that even after having completed 3 previous Journeys of Worth that I still have this much crap to look at? And from wayy back as a child!?

This is where the rubber meets the road. Do I have a body? yes. Then I still have crap to deal with. There is no slacking; there is no giving up; there is no stopping until either I die, or I finish my 50 years of Journeys in 2068, or I become enlightened/ascended.

This is really good motivation to become enlightened/ascended sooner, that’s fer sure. Do I really have 48 more years of digging deeply and rooting out crap? Not if I ascend first!

Onward!

If you haven’t already, write your Why. What crap do you have lingering in the recesses of your mind? Root it out! Let’s do this.
Tomorrow will be the commitment and dedication.