Hope for the Future– Worth (1.3.21)

 

Copyright Tam Black 2018
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Welcome to Round 3!

We’re halfway done! How are you doing? How is your life going? How’s your Journey going?

If you’re new to this process, this is where “I” and “you” become “WE”! (See this page, under the heading “Four Rounds” for more information about how the Guiding Thoughts change this round). If you’ve been here for a while, you know how this part of the Journey works 🙂

In the journey of Life, I anchor myself in the Journey, and the Journey anchors me.

Guiding Thought

We have forgotten our Self. We have forgotten who we are. We have forgotten that we are established in Love and by Love, which is infinite and eternal; therefore, our worth is infinite and eternal.

We seek to remember our Self. We choose to remember our Self.

We choose to remember who we are and our infinite worth in Love.

We choose to be aware, to understand, and to Know Our Self as the Love we are.

We choose to share who we are with the world, giving our infinite worth, measured in infinite Love.

Reflection

I feel conflicted about this Guiding Thought a lot. It’s like part of me simply does not want to say or admit in any way to forgetting myself. It feels like it contradicts the bigger picture of what I’m doing here, which is (simply put) affirming Oneness, and Union with my Divine Self. If I admit to forgetting my Self, is that not affirming exactly the opposite of what I want?

There are two things that I tell myself to work through this dilemma I seem to find myself in.

  1. I have to acknowledge the forgetting, in order to remember (see day one of this Journey!)
  2. If I am in a physical body…then I have forgotten. Being in this particular dimension/reality/state of consciousness (whatever you want to call it), means inherently that I (you-we) have forgotten. It comes with the territory, like heat with flame. The physical body/reality is set up as dualistic, divisive, separating and that’s just the way it is.

I was going to say, “and there’s nothing we can do about it”.

But I didn’t because there is something we can do about it. And we are doing it right now. We are remembering Oneness. We are bridging the divide. That’s what the Journeys are all about! (in case you hadn’t noticed)  😉

Two points about my above two points:

  1. I’ve been saying the Bhavanyashtakam several times a week. This is one verse: O Mother, I feel like an orphan on this Earth, powerless and without inner wealth, deluded by ignorance and unable to see the light of truth. It has started to feel so true. It’s like a part of me really understands the difference between what I am experiencing here on earth, and what is possible. Because this verse is saying between the lines that I Know what real inner wealth is, that I Know myself as familiar with the light of truth. If I didn’t know myself as “home”, with power and inner wealth, with wisdom, and able to see the light of truth… how would I know to feel anything different? It’s like acknowledging what I don’t experience tells me that there’s a part of me that Knows that experience. You see?
  2. The whole thing about being in a physical body does not apply to those who have ascended, avatars, or anyone who can change their body into light, leave the planet, then return whenever they want to. This is what I am aspiring to. If you can already do this, I’d like to meet you, or at least be aware of you “out there”. If you are so inclined, drop me a line. If you are further inclined, I accept any help and guidance you would like to give. Thank you in advance.

I just felt like Lestat leaving “Marius” carved into buildings all over the planet. (For those who have read Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicles).

These are exciting times! Let’s get to remembering folks 🙂

Ripped Open– Worth (1.3.10)

Copyright Tam Black 2018
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

If I am to be my Self in the world, I must be for others as well as myself. There is no other.

I am willing to be receptive to the Infinite Love of All. I am willing to understand how I must rise above the struggles and pains of the world. I am willing to rise again and again with each call for help, each outstretched hand. I am willing to be the one to choose to change. I offer my pain, suffering, guilt and blame up for transformation, into the light of Love that I may see and give only the light of Love always.

Reflection

Mother, this is our only prayer: May no one in all the worlds experience pain or sorrow. Save us from out (inner) enemies. Om Tat Sat. (Sapta Sloki Durga)

Compassion is the understanding of suffering. There is no peace, joy, or hope until those who suffer are understood. Compassion is the soul of these words; without it, they are empty. Compassion fills them with truth, honor, and purpose. (From Medical Medium by Anthony William)

There is so much here today.

  • Being willing to see others as yourself (walk in someone else’s shoes).
  • Being willing to feel pain and suffering–and walk through it.
  • Being willing to feel the pain and suffering of someone else, and respond to it with compassion.
  • To release pain and suffering “up for transformation”.

As I’ve mentioned several times now, I have been working more with the Holy Spirit, and the Divine Mother/Femine energy. I’ve been praying, chanting, and doing other devotions specifically to connect with this “Shakti” energy.

When I wrote this Guiding Thought a couple of years ago, it meant something different to me than it does today. Then, I thought it meant that I’m supposed to “be the strong one”, or “help people through something”, or “take on the pain and suffering so others don’t need to”.

Not today.

You see, I’ve been digging deeply into my own pain and suffering (which has come out at odd times, mostly in the middle of the night as anxiety and panic, with tears, many tears). I feel frozen, I feel defeated. I feel hopeless. Sometimes I feel like I am going to die.

And there is nothing can do. The feeling is, “I’ve tried everything. I’m at a loss. I don’t know what to do, or where to turn”. There are prayers written for this feeling.

From the Orthodox tradition:

  • Suddenly the Judge shall come, and the deeds of each shall be laid bare; but with fear do we cry at midnight: Holy, Holy, Holy art Thou, O God; through the Theotokos, have mercy on us.
  • Grant me not to fall asleep in the death of sin, but have compassion on me, O Thou Who wast voluntarily crucified, and hasten to raise me who am reclining in idleness, and save me in prayer and intercession
  • It has been a lesson in asking for Divine intervention, Divine help, and giving up…really giving up. When the feeling is deeply that “there is nothing I can do to help myself”, there is comfort in turning to the Divine Mother/Holy Spirit.
  • heal the perennial passions of my soul. Guide me to the path of repentance, for I am tossed in the storm of life. Deliver me from eternal fire, and from evil worms, and from Tartarus. Let me not be exposed to the rejoicing of demons, guilty as I am of many sins. Renew me, grown old from senseless sins, O most immaculate one. Present me untouched by all torments, and pray for me to the Master of all.

From the Hindu tradition:

  • I have fallen in the ocean of birth and death, and I fear their sorrows. I am trapped by my ego, with its countless desires, greed, pride and lust.
  • I do not know how to be righteous or find your abode. I do not know how to achieve freedom by dissolving my ego. I am devoid of the will to fight; I surrender. I am not strong enough to make any vow.
  • My mind is always engaged in worthless thoughts and actions. My intellect has become dull, enslaved by old habits. I am unable to behave honourably and my intentions are self-serving. My speech is harsh and hurtful.

I have asked for this; I have asked for transformation. I have asked to be cleansed and purified, so that I may be a pure vehicle for the Holy Spirit. Ask and ye shall receive. But be prepared–it ain’t all smiles and roses.

My current experience is that when I allow myself to really feel these things, it is like I am just ripped open and stuff I didn’t even know was there (and that I don’t know what it is, necessarily) pours out, and keeps pouring out. This is when it’s not all happy and pleasant.

The good news is that this is the death of the ego, and there is Divine aid. Jesus is there to help. The Divine Mother is there to help, along with the Holy Spirit, and any/every other Divine being who you call to.

They are the embodiment of today’s Guiding Thought. They are fully for others, and they know there is no other. They are the embodiment of Infinite Love of All. They have already risen above the struggles and pains of the world, and they are here to help us do the same. They accept our pain, suffering, guilt and blame and transform it, into the light of Love that we may see and give only the light of Love always.