At the Feet of the Father -Healing (1.4.32)

Copyright Tam Black 2018
Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Guiding Thought

I go deep within my inner stillness, and feel Divine Mind’s presence within me. I hold out my empty hands, symbolic of leaving preconceptions behind, symbolic of seeking True answers, and I ask, “What is the essence of healing?” These words resonate within me, as though in a vast cavern.  The word essence reverberates with these thoughts, “For what do I care most deeply?”; “What is my own essence?”; “What is my Truth?”; “Where is my deepest hurt, my pain, my sorrow, that all may be healed?”

Reflection

Round four is here; the Journey is coming together! If you’ve been following along, you may see it. But hopefully you are paying more attention to your own Journey, your own connections, and your own progress than you are to my process.

Let me lay it out for you, so you can get back to thinking about how the Journey is coming together for you.

I would say that day 22 began the coalescence. It was that day that I went into my heart (Dicrysahe), and asked questions from a deeper, more focused place. Asking questions with the heart is like laser-beam energy going right to the “heart of the matter”. The insights come with the same kind of focused energy; all of a sudden, there is an answer that just makes sense.

After that, there were six days of being in this “healing fog”: unassociated stuff coming up, going out, clearing up, moving through. The fog is not what I would call fun, but it also was not deeply dramatic or intense. It was more like watching a bad movie–I just kind of sat through it, being aware of not really enjoying myself, but getting through it. And at least I had the Journey, as well as some signposts to clue me in to what was going on, so that I could have some understanding sprinkled in.

Then just three days ago, the fog lifted. Apparently enough stuff had cleared out and it was time for the next step (or layer or something).

Two days ago I wrote about being broken, rebuilding, and the strength that comes from that process.

Yesterday, I associated being broken with letting go of all the stuff that inhibits a person from following Divine Will–and that when we allow ourselves to be rebuilt in such a way that we align with Divine Will, we step into the Truth of our Selves, which is Whole, Holy, Healthy.

Yesterday, I wrote this, “But, each time I arrive at the feet of my Father, I give up more of my lower-self”

And we arrive at today…

This morning, as I was waking up, I found myself at the feet of my Father–there’s this place I “go to” in my mind, where I meet with Him; usually I have to think about it, and imagine it; this time, I was just there, without thinking, in Dicrysahe. I was laying everything at his feet, and I realized for the first time (one of those, “how did I miss this?” moments) that I have more “worldly cares” than I realized. It was like one of those magic tricks, where the magician just keeps pulling things out of a bag: “oh, and there’s this” and “oh, and here is that”…I pulled out everything–health stuff, financial stuff, job stuff, projects stuff, family stuff, worries and cares, worries and cares. And I just said, “I don’t know what to do with all this, so I am giving it to you (and literally laid it at His feet). Please take it, and use it however you need to, to benefit All. Only You can do this; only You can orchestrate how this will be used for a Loving purpose”.

Several hours later, as I was doing the dishes, I felt (again Dicrysahe) this: “Know everything is what it is supposed to be; all is going as intended; have faith“.

Did I get a True answer? Maybe.

At least for me, now, the answer to “What is the essence of healing?” is: have faith.

And I can say that I have current answers for the next questions as well (following from the past 10 days):

“For what do I care most deeply?” Truth, my relationship with God, Divine Will

“What is my own essence?” Peace, stillness

“What is my Truth?” My heart, my relationship with God.

“Where is my deepest hurt, my pain, my sorrow, that all may be healed?” Find it, lay it at the feet of the Father, be free!

 

Full-Empty-Wholeness-Separation–Journey of Gratitude 2017, day 26

I’ve been working with a meditation that has these words, “Change is easily manifesting in my life through God’s Divine Grace and Love. As each aspect of my life that needs changing now surfaces before me, I LOVE it FREE, and forgive myself for any perceived transgression of the laws of harmony and balance”. Let me tell you. I’ve been having so many opportunities to LOVE things FREE. Yeah. Not as easy as it sounds, but here’s a recent hands-on opportunity.

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Copyright Tam Black 2015 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2015
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

When we look within and see the radiance of Love, we remember our wholeness. We are wholly loving and wholly lovable. In the purity of Love lies peace, which we share with all in gratitude.

Reflection

How do you see the world? You know the saying about the glass being half full or half empty? The other day, I had a very direct and literal experience in which I saw the “glass” full, and someone else saw it “empty”.

Last week, I had made lunch for my colleagues at work. After everyone ate their fill, I put the food away, and set aside a small container of each of the dishes for a colleague (we had emailed the previous day about leftovers and I had offered some, if there were any). Then I emailed the colleague and said, “3 containers. Top shelf. Yours.” Based on our emails the previous day, and the fact that there had just been a bunch of food out, I guess I thought the word “full” in front of “containers” was redundant… or that “full” was implied.

When she saw me a bit later, she said, in response to my email, “Oh, and those containers, you can have them….” and I thought, “Cool. More for me”, but I said, “Really? You don’t want them”? And in that moment, I could see her pause and think, “Wait a minute…what did I just say ‘no’ to?” while she shook her head and said, “No”. I “saw” that she had the word “empty” in front of “containers”, instead of “full”–of course she did not want empty containers!

We “see” things in our imaginations. What adjectives do you use unconsciously in front of words in your head? How do you see the world? John Randolph Price, in his book, The Angels Within Us talks about changing your projection–literally. Change how you see, change the adjectives that you have in front of words.

Here is another example that just happened this morning, in which it was who needed to change my projection:

My H.R. rep. is known to (selectively) nit-pick about people’s time, schedules, use of sick days/vacation/personal days. One employee who came in 30 minutes early every morning received a reprimand for leaving 5 minutes early one day.

This morning, after I had been at work 20 minutes, my H.R. rep. came up to me and said, “Did you have trouble getting to work today”? From any other person, this could have been an innocent query, one about traffic, or the weather, or an accident, etc., but from my H.R. rep., it felt like an accusation–as though she was implying I had been late, and I felt this flush of guilt, for something I hadn’t done.

After the interaction, I felt infuriated. I really don’t like to be falsely accused, and I definitely felt falsely accused. (Though, just now, the scripture occurs to me: Blessed are ye, when men shall revile, and persecute you, and say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.)

I remembered my meditation (words above), about things that need to be changed coming up…and loving them free. So, I started loving really loving my H.R. rep., and the situation, and releasing whatever it was that was asking to be released. I began to feel better.

Shortly after that, I spoke with a friend of mine who said this, “Maybe she just had a difficult time getting to work and wondered if anyone else experienced the same. Maybe she was wanting to feel connected with someone rather than feeling isolated and alone. As though she was seeking validation, like, me too, something must be going on out there in the world, because now I know you had trouble, too getting to work, now we are an us and that “out there” causing us “getting to work trouble” is them; It’s an opportunity to unite!

I thought, that’s it! From that moment, I decided that she was reaching out, connecting with me, and I was there to help her not feel isolated and alone. I changed my projection and became a support for her experience (in my head, in my imagination). It totally changed my outlook, my day, and any subsequent interaction. I was able to shift from feeling guilty and infuriated to feeling release, freedom, cooperation, unity, connection, even Love.

I choose to see with Love’s eyes… As much as I am able!

 

 

 

“Distractions To The Rescue”: Journey of Worth 2.0 – Day 10

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

If I am to be my Self in the world, I must be for others as well as myself. There is no other.

I am willing to be receptive to the Infinite Love of All. I am willing to understand how I must rise above the struggles and pains of the world. I am willing to rise again and again with each call for help, each outstretched hand. I am willing to be the one to choose to change. I offer my pain, suffering, guilt, and blame up for transformation, into the light of Love, that I may see and give only the light of Love always.

 

Sharing

When Facebook validates the Journey, I know I must be doing something right (at least, that’s one way to look at it). You know how FB reminds you of a memory, and asks if you’d like to share it again? All of mine recently have been really stupid, like horrible smoothies and other bad food experiences, so I didn’t share them. Today, though, FB was right there with me on the Journey…how did FB know!??  Apparently, I posted this 4 years ago on my timeline:

“…freedom must always be exercised in a concrete manner. We will freedom for freedom’s sake through our individual circumstances. And in thus willing freedom, we discover that it depends entirely on the freedom of others, and that the freedom of others depends on our own…I am obliged to will the freedom of others at the same time I will my own. -Jean Paul Sartre (bold, mine, today)

4 years ago, I hadn’t even started doing these Journeys; I don’t think they were even conceived at that time. Yet, I was posting ideas whose essence is reflected in the Guiding Thought for today.

I was kind of glad about the validation, because I had a bit of a rough morning. During my workout (my new morning practice, that is taking the place of my baths), my knee became funky (old injuries and lots of athleticism sometimes make it act up, so to say) and I had to stop the workout. Fortunately, I was able to tell myself, “This funky knee is going to go away as quickly and as quietly as it came, and my knee will be back to normal without me even knowing when or how”. And lo, at some point before I got to work, my knee was back to normal, and I didn’t even know when it happened! (I’m SOOOO happy I will be able to work out tomorrow!)

Then, also, when I was doing my meditation for the 7.125 billion people on the planet, I was totally, totally distracted. It was sort of like the mental-spiritual equivalent of what I experienced a couple of days ago, when I wrote Keep Pushing Play. In my distraction, I kept thinking, “I should just stop. This is not the right frame of mind to do this. I need to get centered and focused, then I can do this meditation.” But again: that’s not how this works. Show up. Do what is before you, whatever your mind-set. Keep pushing play.

There are days when I am fully immersed in my meditation. When I can visualize easily and vibrantly. On these days, I can tell I am going deep, really feeling the intention behind the meditation. But there are also days when I am very distracted, as I was today. There are so many variations between these on every other day. Who am I to say that one is “better” or more real than the other?

When I feel distracted, I figure it’s just that those meditative energies need to work on me in a deeper way than my conscious mind will allow. So, those energies distract me, and turn my mind to other things–they get “me” out of the way, so they can do what they need to within and through me.

For me, it’s more important to be who I am, where I am (mentally-emotionally-spiritually), and approach the practice from that place of authenticity, than it is to stop what I am doing “until I feel right about it”. Because if I did that, I would probably never feel right about anything.