Afterword/Reflection –Journey of Courage 02.09.41

Wow! Just reading through 40 days of responses to Guiding Thoughts, it’s been quite a Journey. I feel like I’ve written a book. How does one “reflect” on a continuing Journey? I notice some things are consistent in my life.  On Day 40 I wrote about clutter and promised myself to “work” on uncluttering my desk. That’s been a revealing process. First of all, in the car a couple days ago, I said to Steve “It’s going to take FOREVER!”  And the proverbial light bulb flashed on as bright as the sun. While I do my best to speak from a positive place, this one slipped right out.  Steve looked at me and suggested that that declaration could very well be why my desk has NEVER been uncluttered. So I reframed it to an intention to have the desk uncluttered before I leave for San Antonio later this month. This is not just getting the stacks of papers off the desk. It’s going through all files. My personal file was so full I could barely add another sheet of paper. I’m in process of culling that now. When my father left his home 3 years ago for assisted living, I assumed his files and his paperwork and bill paying. His files were not in good shape to begin with and 3 years of my haphazard habit of doing the bare minimum had taken its toll. Those files are not organized. After the files, there’s much more left to do – the 2 drawers in the desk that hold pens, paperclips, business cards and other riff-raff will also be culled. In reflecting on this process, and the process of downsizing Dad from a 3-bedroom home with two large sheds to the single room he resides in now, I decided to take steps in the direction of “minimalizing”. I just put a hold on a library book on “Swedish Death Cleaning”, hoping that I will learn some things, and not leave my son or whoever my survivor(s) may be to make sense out of chaos.

But, I’m off on a tangent. Reflecting on the Journey of Courage, I’ve learned that I’m much more courageous than I have been giving myself credit for. In some areas where I’ve retreated in recent years, I’ll be taking a more active role. I’ll be leading some guided meditations soon. I’ll be taking a more active role in a women’s group where I’ve been a rather passive member.

My “reflection” I’m discovering, is not so much a look back as it is a look forward. However, in culling my files, I found a copy of a letter I’d written more than 30 years ago. It was several pages of a soul-searching piece, which is why I kept a copy. The bottom line reads

“It is possible that this little spark of life in me—or the large spark of life that is this planet—could be snuffed out any second of any day. I’m determined to be ready with a smile on my face, thankful that I have loved well.” At the end of Day 27 of this Journey of Courage, I concluded “when I’m no longer in this physical form, I can think of only ONE thing I hope is said about Mary Wallace. “SHE LOVED WELL.”

I continue to believe our mission here, should we choose to accept it, is to learn to love well.

 

Thank you, Sus, for guiding me to rediscover, or rather, to reaffirm my commitment to learning to love.

I love you!

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Beauty is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

I am happy to say there is another new Guest Blogger, who will be taking the Journey of Beauty here on this site! I will introduce her publicly soon… for those of you following along, here is the schedule:

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)
Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)
May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)

Dancing with the Stars –Journey of Courage 02.09.40

Guiding Thought

I am aware, I allow, and I accept What Is. I go within to my silent Self which Knows and follow my Inner Wisdom to Truth. I practice Divine Balance in thought, word, and action. I Am! I Am my Self! I Am my Self of Love!

Contemplation / Reflection

Wow, day 40, Finally! Already! I don’t quite know where to put that. I thought this would be the end of this Journey of Courage. Instead, I find that What Is, is that I’ve made new commitments to myself through this Journey. Yes, I’m getting up a little earlier every morning. The Divine Balance in my thought, word and action is evaporating the obscuration of the thought “I am not a morning person”. It’s also changing my actions regarding clutter, particularly where the papers on my desk are concerned. But that’s not all. On a deeper level, I am more in touch with my “inner Wisdom” and truth. It’s hard to hide from the truth when you challenge yourself to find the courage to tell the truth. The clutter on my desk is only the outward manifestation of a level of clutter in my thoughts and actions. I’ve uncluttered my closet. I’ve uncluttered my bookshelf. A nice start, perhaps, but I haven’t uncluttered my desk. In terms of this Journey, I obviously still have lots of work to do. In the meantime, I AM my Self of Love! I Love the changes taking place. While I’m completing the commitment of 40 days of responding to these Guiding Thoughts, I find I have new commitments now. The beauty of this is that it’s commitments to my self, and my Self. Practicing Divine Balance is just that – a dance with Divine Balance. I intend to continue dancing as if no one is watching. But I’ll be watching! You may look for me dancing with the Stars, but not on television!

 

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Courage is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)

Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)

May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)

Hobbies as a Doorway to Peace –Journey of Courage 02.09.39

Guiding Thought

I accept my light and my lightness! I feel my Self expand! As I perceive change around me, I remain anchored in my Being of Light. I allow myself to sit peacefully in the still place of nothingness as life moves quickly around me.

Contemplation / Reflection

Light and lightness. I’m feeling a lightness about this Journey. Only one more day of commitment. My husband has already congratulated me on a “job well done”. I asked him to save his congratulations until tomorrow. The lightness I’m experiencing is about demonstrating that I can make a 40+ day commitment and keep it.  Sometimes that’s a big deal.

And then, of course, there’s the actual light around me. It’s been one of those days where it’s gray and pouring rain one minute, with the sun shining brightly the next. Sometimes the lack of daylight can impact my sense of my “Being of Light”.

I’ve been playing with a new hobby today. I realized afterward that it required a single focus of attention, a “still place of nothingness” as life was moving around me. It seems like many hobbies are like this. We can remove ourselves to a more still place, somewhat removed from the life moving around us. Perhaps that’s why we gravitate toward hobbies in the first place. When we get really involved with them, the rest of life goes on around us. We sit peacefully. While I was working on my project, I was distantly aware that my husband was playing his guitar, involved in his own still place. Perhaps, when we find that place in ourselves, it radiates outward and impacts those around us. I plan to practice carrying my lightness, my expanded Self, into my days as I interact with others. I’d like to notice if, “anchored in my Being of Light”, I can shed some of that light on those around me, helping slow the pace of the life that moves so very quickly around all of us.

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Courage is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)

Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)

May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)

How To: Embrace Your Heart’s Love –Journey of Courage 02.09.38

Guiding Thought

I allow myself to connect with my pure Inner Divine Heart of Oneness. I am aware of the expression of the Divine Heart through me, as me. I connect with my heart, and am aware of embodying its pure Love intention for All. I am filled with Joy as I embrace my heart’s Love.

Contemplation / Reflection

Some of the most inspiring and personally rewarding experiences of my life have been, and continue to be, volunteer activities. One of the earliest I recall was called “Holiday Hospital Project”. Participants visited local hospitals on Christmas day, singing carols and delivering gifts to those who were hospitalized during this holiday. It was an amazing experience. I’ve also volunteered with a local hospital’s hospice patients. As a hospice volunteer I would visit with a terminally ill patient while their primary caregiver received a few hours of respite. The caregiver could go shopping, take in a movie, connect with a friend, enjoy a walk or simply disappear into another room for a well-deserved nap. Sometimes my task was to read to the patient, or watch a sport on TV, or just to be there sitting with them while they napped. I served on the board of a local environmental group. I wrote newsletters for a Native American action group. Currently, I’m a “chemo angel”, committed to sending weekly notes or small gifts to people experiencing chemotherapy. (visit chemoangels.com If you want to know more, or if you know someone experiencing this treatment who would like to receive snail mail encouragement.) Before doing much volunteer “work”, I used to think that volunteers were the “givers”. But, once I got into ANY volunteer task or activity, I was the recipient – filled with joy as I “embraced my heart’s Love”. Such “work” is so personally enriching and rewarding, it’s not something that can easily be put into words. I encourage anyone and everyone to find a volunteer outlet and to participate. There are so many options, something for everyone. Volunteering is an opportunity to discover your own personal creativity. You can express your Self in ways you may not have opportunity to do in a “job”. You can set your own hours and boundaries. (Just a warning that protecting your personal boundaries is one of the earliest lessons in volunteering. You will be SO appreciated and any organization will just want MORE of you. SET YOUR OWN BOUNDARIES.) That being said, when you “give” yourself to a volunteer role that suits you, you will find yourself connected with your heart and its pure Love intention, you will “embrace your heart’s Love” in beautiful ways you never anticipated. I know I have, every time.

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Courage is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)

Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)

May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)

What Kind of Travel Companion are YOU? –Journey of Courage 02.09.37

Guiding Thought

Love is strong! Powerful! I embrace Love and wield it through my awareness of Oneness. Oneness destroys the illusions of the mind, of the past, and of the material world. I move forward courageously with Peace in the Truth of Love and Oneness.

Contemplation / Reflection

I like to travel. I’ve noticed over the years that how a trip is planned can depend a great deal on who I’m traveling with. I’m a fairly spontaneous person. That’s not an issue with some travel companions. With others, they need to know, before we leave, exactly where we’re going, how long it will take to get there, where we will sleep, where we will eat, what we’re going to stop and see and how much it’s going to cost. They will also want to know if the car has been recently serviced, what kind of mileage we might expect, and how much we’ll spend on fuel, and what time we’ll be home. Check-in time, check-out time, rest stops and snacks may also need to be pre-planned. And don’t even get me started on how the weather will be and what we need to pack! My awareness of Oneness has helped me to realize that, while not necessarily important to me, these things are often vital to the Peace of mind and enjoyment of my travel companion. I’ve also learned that, after a few experiences of these differences, I, too, feel more comfortable with a bit more advanced planning. So, we meet in the middle. A little less planning for my companion, a little more for me. This is a demonstration of Peace in the Truth of Love and Oneness. And we BOTH have a much more stimulating and pleasurable experience because of it.

 

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Courage is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)

Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)

May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)

Precognitive Set-up –Journey of Courage 02.09.36

Guiding Thought

I am responsible! I am able to respond with and through conscious awareness of my inner-centered, silent Knowingness. I practice Knowingness moment by moment. Anchored in my inner-harmony, I have the courage to face my own thoughts and actions.

Contemplation / Reflection

Yesterday I posted about letting go of “false boundaries”. I have, for some time, been thinking, “I am not a morning person.” I asked my husband to wake me 15 minutes before my recent wake up time. My plan was to get up earlier in 15 minute increments. Instead of him waking me 15 minutes ahead of normal, I woke myself 45 minutes earlier. It felt great! I’ll do the same tomorrow. I feel this falls into the category of “courage to face my OWN thoughts and actions”. I can OWN those actions, without asking my husband to participate in the shift to “I AM a morning person”. I’m actually looking forward, someday in the not-too-distant future, to being up to witness the glorious sunrise. That’s something I’ve only done in recent history if I had to get up early enough to catch a morning flight.

Yesterday I also took my elderly father out for lunch and to a doctor’s appointment. He requires a wheelchair and oxygen tank any time he leaves home. In past experience, I’ve had someone with me to assist with all this cargo, but yesterday I was flying solo.  I faced the thought that this was going to be a challenge for me.  The wheelchair? That puppy’s pretty heavy to load and unload! Dad’s primary caregiver came out and loaded the chair into my car. He showed me the most efficient way to lift it.  So I unloaded at the restaurant. Reloaded it after lunch.  Unloaded it at the doctor’s. Reloaded to drive him home. Unloaded it at his house. Surprisingly, it wasn’t difficult at all!  So much for “facing my thoughts and actions”. The thought is often a precognitive set-up for the action. Without that negative thought, the action turned out much more comfortably. How often do I unconsciously set myself up to make things more difficult than necessary? Mindfulness/Knowingness is a wonderful thing. I’ll be watching myself more closely to face other circumstances where I think I “know” how things will go, without any real “Knowingness”!

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Courage is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)

Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)

May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)

Shining Light on “False Boundaries” –Journey of Courage 02.09.35

Guiding Thought

I am ready and willing, here and now, to be courageous. I release my mind’s idea of security, of “right” and of “wrong”. I allow my personality to dissolve and to become One with the Love that is everywhere. All false boundaries evaporate like mist in the sun as I devote myself to the oneness of Love.

Contemplation / Reflection

“I am not a morning person.” My thought as I awakened this morning. My husband was already up, dressed, and off running errands. Then the thought “who says I’m not a morning person?” The answer, of course, is I SAY SO, and so it is. I think about all the years that I “allowed my personality to dissolve” and showed up at work by seven AM. It feels like “my personality” would prefer to stay up late, and then to sleep in a bit. BUT, I have been courageous about dissolving that in the past. SO, I’m going to challenge myself to do so again. I WILL get up a bit earlier, and go to bed a bit earlier. As summer approaches and the sun rises earlier and earlier, it will be easier and easier for me to do so too. Gradually, I’ll return to being a “morning person”. By this time next month, I’ll be up, have coffee and be at the swim pool in time to begin my day with a water exercise class. So I look at what other illusionary beliefs I hold about myself that I think it might be beneficial to change. Since retiring from decades of deskwork, I’ve been doing a wonderful job of avoiding paperwork as evidenced by the stacks of paper on my desk. Do I have the courage to change to a belief that I handle all paperwork promptly and easily? While my home is “clean enough”, do I have the courage to transition to “a place for everything and everything in its place” – no clutter? We’ll see. But without these Guiding Thoughts shining light on these “false boundaries” I’ve set for myself, I wouldn’t, even now, be considering finding the courage to “evaporate” them. As I’ve been writing these thoughts these past weeks, I’ve learned that I AM strong, I AM courageous, and I am devoted to the oneness of Love. And I would LOVE a tidy desk and a morning workout in the local swim pool.

 

Guest Contributor Mary Wallace

 

 

 

 

 

Journey of Courage is now available as a free book.
You no longer need to wait for the Guiding Thoughts to be posted here daily–you may move at your own pace. This link will take you to the document in Dropbox; you may download it from there.

I accept donations and gifts via paypal: paypal.me/SusanBillmaier Thank you for the energy exchange!

Journey of Beauty Begins April 18!

Apr 18 Preliminary day Introduction: Why A Journey of Beauty (02.10.0)
Apr 19 Preliminary day Commitment and Dedication (02.10.00)

Apr 20 – 29 Days 01-10 Round One (02.10.01-10)
Apr 30 – May 9 Days 11-20 Round Two (02.10.11-20)
May 10 – 19 Days 21-30 Round Three (02.10.21-30)
May 20 – 29 Days 31-40 Round Four (02.10.31-40)

May 30 – June 8 Reflection days Gently care, de-fuse, and write one day of reflection on the Journey (02.10.41)