Allowing vs. Making -Healing (1.4.38)

Copyright Tam Black 2018
Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Guiding Thought

Today I decide to be aware of my Whole and Holy Self working within me, expressing through me. As I move through the affairs of my life, with an open mind and empty hands, I look first to my Whole and Holy Self for guidance. My only decision today is to be aware of my Whole and Holy Self—all other decisions arise out of this, in conjunction with my Self.

Reflection

Always remember that nature refuses to be rushed. She can only be made to evolve and that takes time. Take heart! -Dharma Mittra

I have so far to go. There are so many people in the world doing such great work, advancing themselves, teaching, being loving and compassionate, sharing it, bringing all that into the world. Wow. Om Namo Namah. I bow to you. Thank you for your contribution.

This is why I needed to add the quote at the top. It’s a reminder to myself that evolution takes time; I may not be as far along the path as I think I should be, or comparatively as far as some people, but I must remind myself: this is my path, no one else’s. I have to walk it as only I can. and, as I say, “every drop counts, every step matters”–each day, every little thing that I do to contribute to my growth and evolution, to becoming the person I know I am, matters.

And, honestly? I love my path. I love what I do and who I am…but I also get frustrated and impatient with myself because think I “should be” doing more. This Journey is really helping me with this. I am allowing myself to evolve (heal), rather than trying to make myself evolve.

Can you feel that difference? Allowing vs. making? One is an easy opening, the other is a forcing, prying. What happens when something is allowed? It happens gently, naturally. What happens when something is forced? There is resistance, pushing back.

It’s the same feeling when I decide to be aware of my Whole and Holy Self working within me.

How do I make my decision to be aware of my Whole and Holy Self? Do I do it with an attitude of allowing or making? Do I open myself joyfully to my Whole and Holy Self, or do I feel like I have to really work at making myself decide to be aware of my Self’s inner activity?

When I am “too hard” on myself, when I think I am not going far enough, fast enough, I try to make myself go further, faster.

There is a certain amount of “pushing” myself that is positive/healthy: that is a pushing through the ego, not pushing against the process or the Inner Self.

So there is a level of awareness that I must bring to pushing myself, to make sure I do not overstep pushing through the ego into pushing through the process. The first subdues the ego, the second sabotages the process, through creating unwanted resistance.

I am often very hard on myself. That is one of the reasons that the goals for this Journey were simply to be kind to myself. I need to learn to be more gentle, loving, and patient with myself.

Although I am often hard on myself, I rarely overstep, and most often, I am pushing through a block or an ego-construction. But, when I do overstep and sabotage my process by being too hard on myself, I must step way back to recover.

It’s possible that I have been in a position for much of this Journey of stepping back, learning to allow, which has not been a “normal” thing for me. Perhaps one of the things I have been accomplishing, not even realizing it, is creating a new pattern, new neurological pathways for allowing. This would include being patient with myself, being gentle with myself, being accepting of myself.

…Which would be good, because I have a long way to go!

 

Good Enough– Worth (1.3.17)

Copyright Tam Black 2018
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

Claim who you are, the essence of your Self, established in and by Love. Your Self shines with the strength, beauty, and power of its essence, Love. As you open to your Self, accept your Self, and Love your Self, the Life of Unity infuses all your activity and transforms your consciousness. Life as your Self renews your Joy and restores your trust in Life itself.

Reflection

I like patterns. I like identifying constancy within change. I like the predictability of a pattern, and the learning opportunity if it changes. This is true for me whether the pattern is material or spiritual, though spiritual patterns are much more elusive.

In a way, patterns are a study in observing cause and effect. “If I do this, I get this result”. If I change this slightly…what happens?

I am currently at a point in one of my own patterns in which I think I know what I should be doing, but it’s hard to get myself to do it. I feel disconnected, and don’t know what to rely on, or what action will achieve the result I want.

This not knowing or uncertainty is part of a larger pattern of fluctuation between certainty and uncertainty, trust and doubt, feeling like I am in the flow, and feeling really out of sorts.

So what do I do?

I have very basic practices that I rely on. These are my daily practices as well simple prayers/mantras. When I feel this way, I turn to them. If I can just do the minimum, that is good enough.

Generally speaking, I don’t like “just good enough”. I like to advance myself by doing all I can do. But sometimes that does not work. Today is a “just good enough day”…and I’m ok with that. I know my pattern, and I never stay here very long anymore.

 

No One’s Mind Works Like Yours 

Whether or not you are on a spiritual path, the title of this post holds true. No one thinks the way you do; no one’s mind operates as yours does. Everyone has completely different mental associations regarding very basic experiences (much less the more complicated ones!) and from those mental associations everyone has different emotions attached to those experiences; neurologically, everyone thus also has different patterns of brain/body activity in the form of tiny electrical neuron “signals”.

For example, we all know what “breakfast” is. Some people eat breakfast in a car (and everyone’s car is different) some at work (and everyone’s work is different), some not at all. People’s experience of place is different. Some people eat a Mcsandwich, some donuts, some fruit and a nutrition bar. Everyone’s experience of substance is different. 

These types of difference are noticeable and easily overcome if the place or substance changes, like having pancakes on the weekends, joining a friend at a restaurant, or socializing after a Sunday meeting.

The invisible associations like emotions or neuron patterns are much more difficult to ascertain, but these invisible associations influence behavior, and thus can affect how people relate to others. 

For example, what if breakfast is the loneliest point in a child’s day? What if breakfast is where two spouses argue over their hectic schedules and how little time they have for each other or for themselves? What if breakfast is where grandma sits quietly drinking coffee…then one day grandma is no longer there? 

You never really know how people have experienced anything. You never really know what mental/emotional associations people bring to situations and relationships.

Sometimes, this is called “baggage”, but it’s only referred to as such when it causes “a problem”, when there is a lack of understanding about those invisible influences.

Doing personal or spiritual work sheds light on these invisible influences. An adult who was a lonely child may intentionally separate him or herself at a group breakfast, because being lonely is what they know and are comfortable with. Arguing over time and responsibility may be an expression of really wanting more love and time with that other person. A loud or boisterous person may be expressing a need to fill a sad void. 

These influences are underneath everyone’s behavior. When we become aware of such associations within ourselves,  we are able to understand our behaviors better. Understanding brings greater choice, greater self-determination. We are no longer susceptible to the unseen influences, because we can see them for what they are and how they affect us. We can choose how we want them to affect us or if we want them to affect us.

More than this, we can begin to see the invisible influences that affect others, and bring patience, love, and acceptance to people and our interactions. 

There are many ways to clear your own mind, gain awareness, and bring in the light of understanding. You have options. Do you already do this work? What do you do? If you’d like some suggestions or don’t know where to start, reach out to me and we’ll talk.