Gaining in Letting Go; Listening Within. Journey of Fulfillment: 03.06.08

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

My motivation is my choice. My intention is my choice. My will is my choice. In Peace, I listen within for guidance so that my actions are motivated by joy, my intentions are love, and my will is simply to share Joy and Love.

Sharing

Two thoughts today.

1.

“My will is my choice.” What about “Thy Will be done“?

So often it seems, people seem to think that “Thy Will be done” means that they must lose, give up, or surrender their personal will. That’s what makes “Thy Will be done” so difficult, yeah? “I don’t want to give up my will. I want my freedom!”

The Journeys are all about aligning with Divine Will, though–allowing Divine Will to come through “me”. And there does seem to be a certain amount of letting go, of surrendering.

Yet, my will is my choice. And I can use my choice to choose Thy Will. Then, I’m not giving up or surrendering; I’m fully utilizing my own free will to choose Thy Will. What’s more, Thy Will holds so much more Peace, Harmony, and All things in Right Order than my little will. Thy Will is so much better for me than my will!

It’s nice to think that even in so-called surrendering to Divine Will, I still have full choice to do or not do, to align with the Divine or decide everything for myself. Life is easier when I make the one small, simple choice to allow Thy Will.

2.

More and more recently, I am listening within for Guidance. It’s not always completely conscious; sometimes I only realize I’ve done it after I have done it.

This is how it happens: I naturally ask questions a lot. Sometimes I am addressing another person, sometimes my questions are in my head. Recently, I’ve “heard” answers to questions that I think are just in my little brain, but the answers are not of my little brain.

Here’s an example. Someone said something to me, and immediately I thought, “Is this B.S., are you lying to me, or are you telling me the truth?” And then all of the sudden, I knew/heard that the answer I was just given was about 70% true, with about 30% exaggeration. Then I immediately asked, “Can I trust this person”? and the answer I got was, “Yes. There is no willful deceit, just trying to make a point”. And this is not the first time something like this has happened.

Now, I am coming to understand that I need to be aware of this question-answer, and to enter into the relationship a little more intentionally, asking questions that I want the answer to, then listening within for the guidance.

I’ll be experimenting with this now!

Peace.

Square One Commencing. Journey of Fulfillment: Day 03.06.07

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

My joy unifies! Accepting my own joy, acknowledging it, sharing it, and expressing it heals me and others. To be wholly joyful means to be wholly love…means to be wholly my Self.

Sharing

I know from experience that the Guiding Thought is correct. I’ve verified it for myself. I’ve experienced situations where joy has unified, where it has lifted and healed. I understand that Joy is a True Expression of the Self.

These are cognitive recognitions and memories of a time. Currently, I neither feel this Truth, nor know how to access it cognitively. >sigh<

Here’s why: I’ve felt really stressed out and overwhelmed the past two weeks. It had been building for a bit before then, but these past two weeks I have felt the walls closing in. Pressure. (This is being reflected in my physical body by headaches and sinus pressure).

I could talk about what it is that is happening; I could tell you the psychology going on; I could tell you some of the things I’m “working on” that are contributors…but what would that accomplish?

I’d rather share what I’m doing about it (so here it is). This was my realization today:

Earlier on in the Journeys, I had to remember to remember my Divine Self. I would do the Journey, meditate, and feel like, “OK I got this”. Then I’d go out into the world, where there was vulnerability to noise, chaos, and distraction and I would forget. So I had to learn to remind myself to remember my Divine Self, so that amidst the noise, distractions, and chaos, I could still center my attention on my Divine Self.

This remembering has gotten much, much better. I now often remember my Divine Self, and call It forth. But now I have something new that I need to remember to remember, another layer shall we say.

That new thing is: my Divine Self does not need to take my human crap, and I can tell my human self “NO MORE”. NO more with the stress. No more with the overwhelm. No more with the pressure. No more playing tired, playing small, playing defeated. NO MORE. I Can Choose. I am a Divine Being, created with Love, with full access to ALL that Love has to offer. I direct my mind and actions with Love, by Love, through Love, and I decide for my highest good (which incidentally has naught to do with stress, pressure, or overwhelm).

What does this mean in practical terms?

In the moment I must recognize that I am feeling/behaving as less than a Divine Being and I must call forth the full Power and Authority of God I Am to take dominion over all my thoughts-actions. I must align with the Divine Will of All Good, All God, and be in Harmony with the Law of Love–the only Law of Power, Expansiveness, and Harmony, dismissing any thought-emotion-action that is less than the Law of Love.

Square One Commenced.

Brain Modification: Journey of Fulfillment 03.06.06

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

Why would I choose to limit my Self? Or choose to limit my reality? All of reality is mine, and mine to give! In giving and sharing, my joy increases, expanding my Love, expanding Life!

Sharing

I feel like this Guiding Thought is a backdoor. It asks questions to which my conscious brain would pretty obviously respond, “I wouldn’t!” or “Right!? why would I choose to limit myself or my reality??”. The point is that no one in their conscious brain would choose to limit themselves.

So why does the Guiding Thought begin here? If it’s a “case closed” scenario, why mention it?

I suspect that the point is twofold. 1) To get very solid buy-in from the brain that “I” would never choose to limit myself 2) To point out that maybe, just maybe, there are places where I do limit myself.

I know there are places where I feel limited. And if I feel limited, there is no one limiting me except me. So, if I am actually limiting myself, why am I choosing that?

And this can feel really overwhelming. On the one hand I am telling myself that I would never limit myself, on the other hand, there are recognitions of limitation that I have “done” to myself.

That contrast could really feel self-defeating.

But the Guiding Thought does not leave me with this self-defeating spin. It gives me a way out. It assures me All of reality is mine, and mine to give!

Then it tells me how to experience this, and “have it all”: In giving and sharing, my joy increases, expanding my Love, expanding Life!

Journey of Fulfillment 03.06.05

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

In Divine Mind, I am already filled full! In my mind I see mere shadows, slight glimpses of true fullness. I remember how much I do not Know! I am determined to fulfill my purpose, to know my Self as Divine Love, and to share the fullness I am.

Sharing

The first two lines of today’s Guiding Thought contrast Divine Mind (in which I am already filled full) and my mind (in which I see mere shadows and glimpses of true fullness).

This is really striking a chord for me today, this contrast.

Everywhere, each person has a mind in which there are shadows and glimpses of true fullness. Every person we meet sees shadows and glimpses.

People act, react, and interact with each other through their own shadows and glimpses…Sometimes while thinking or believing that their shadow or glimpse is the true and correct shadow or glimpse. How shadows and glimpses can be so staunchly defended!

I almost always have two-layers happening these days as I do the Journeys. There is the layer the acknowledges the “what is“, which is what we are currently seeing and experiencing in the world, in our lives (which for many people is chaos, tumult, anxiety, uncertainty).

The second layer reflects the optimist in me. What is is not what is going to be. The Being of now creates a new Being through its own becoming. In other words, this is a transition. What we are seeing and experiencing is real for today, but it may not be real tomorrow.

The optimist in me also believes that more and more, people are remembering how little they know, and remembering their Self, which is Divine Love.

The more each person remembers this now, in this moment of Being, the more each person’s –and our collective–becoming will reflect the Fullness of Divine Being.

Opening More and More– Journey of Gratitude 2017, day 04

What is the essence of the feeling of gratitude? These Journeys are very heady, not so hearty, if you know what I mean. That is why I sometimes draw/color while listening to the Guiding Thought–tapping into creativity by-passes the brain to connect with the heart, the emotions. I didn’t draw today. But I am left wanting…wanting to get closer to the feeling of gratitude. How do you feel gratitude?

Copyright Tam Black 2015 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2015
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

Through gratitude, my consciousness of Love expands, connecting me with All. Gratitude increases my awareness of unity; gratitude shows me our Wholeness. Gratitude is the bridge to knowing others as my Self. What a gift you are!

Reflection

I feel like I have not skipped a beat, even after taking a 40-day Journey of Rest. I am surprised at how synchronous this Journey is, even from the beginning.

I’ve been finding (and being sent) articles on gratitude and related subjects. One says, “Remembering to be thankful flexes a type of emotional intelligence.” Another says, “Positive emotions give us a broader perspective of situations, they give us clarity and confidence in our purpose…they bring us a greater sense of happiness, for the meaning of life becomes energetically present.”

Then the day before yesterday, I got to this place:

To what am I giving? My Self–the Truth of Being–All that IS.

For what am I grateful? My Self–the Truth of Being–All that IS.

What receives my gift? My Self–the Truth of Being–All that IS.

What receives my gratitude? My Self–the Truth of Being–All that IS.

Today, I can see how the Guiding Thought fits right in. Gratitude does so much. It increases emotional intelligence, balancing so-called negative emotions; it increases LOVE, and connects me through that Love, with All that Is. Love then increases my awareness of Unity, how we are all connected, how we are all inter-connected, how we are all influencing and affecting each other. This is how gratitude is a bridge to knowing others as myself, to loving others as myself.

Gratitude opens the mind and heart to seeing in a new way. The more grateful I am, the more I see. The more grateful I am, the more I open to Love. The more I open to Love, the more accepting I am. The more accepting I am, the more I can see…we’re not so different, you and I.

Blessings to you! What a gift you are!

And… my game for the day…

My highest vision of the world for today:

Sparkles. Everyone is so happy, they sparkle. And when two sparkling people interact, the sparkles jump back and forth between them, so that there are mini-fireworks that surround both people.

You?

“Right Here, Right Now”: Journey of Healing 2.0 – Day 05

Copyright Tam Black 2016 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2016
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Guiding Thought

My own Loving Presence is my personal connection with Divine Mind. Attuned to my own Loving Presence, I Know myself as Whole and Holy. As I feel my inner unity, I know: this is all I want; I have found all I seek.

 

Sharing

Just think for a moment what it would feel like to honestly say, “this is all I want; I have found all I seek”. Think for a moment about how it would feel to know, really know, that you and your Divine Self are One, that you are your authentic Self, Love. You are the energy of Love, the Light of Love, the being and body of Love. You are Love’s expression, Love’s vibration, Love’s totality. Everything you look upon is seen through Love’s eyes, every thought you think is through Love’s mind, every step you take is Love Itself.

Just think how that would feel for a moment. Imagine it. Let yourself feel it.

These Journeys are meant to “get me there”. To move my consciousness to a point where all I see and know and feel is Love; a point where I know myself as Love, know Love as me, and know all of my experiences as Love’s outpouring. The Guiding Thoughts replace limiting thoughts of the lower-mind with expanded thoughts of Love; they show me the Truth toward which I am striving, the Truth of Love, Unity, Oneness, Peace.

This morning I spent quite a bit of time “attuning myself to my own Loving Presence”. And you know what? I got it. I saw, felt, and experienced myself as my Loving Presence. It was just a scratch of the surface, and only for about 20 minutes, but I was able to connect myself with my Self, consciously.

It was as though I found myself: “this is all I want, I have found all I seek”. It was like coming home. In that place where I knew myself as Love, I did not have to strive to be Love. I did not have to seek. I didn’t have to visualize love streaming from my heart. It was just there; I was Love; Love was personified as me. I found myself thinking “what if I really could feel this all the time? What if everyone could feel this all the time?” Everything would change, everything would be changed.

So much of these Journeys is about the path, about continuing to move forward, toward more expanded awareness and understanding of yourself as Love. So today, let movement be balanced by stillness. Take a moment and KNOW: You ARE LOVE. Right here, right now. You are all you seek. Breathe and feel the Truth of that. Relax for a moment, because in this moment, and every moment, you are Love, so be. Simply be. And Know yourself now.

Life Itself is the Essence of Fulfillment. A Journey of Fulfillment. Day 09

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

May those who seek, help others find;

May those who sorrow, be compassionate;

May those who are lost, light a path for another;

May those who question or doubt, give guidance;

May those who worry, lift the burden of another;

May those who hide, see their own light in the eyes of a stranger;

May we all give peace, no matter what.

 

Fulfillment is Joy and Love and Peace, and listening to the still voice within that Knows and guides appropriately, always appropriately.

Fulfillment is knowing with total satisfaction that I am in the right place at the right time, doing the right thing. Fulfillment is being confident in the choices I make…or in the choices I refrain from making.

Fulfillment is a feeling of satisfaction, a feeling of accomplishment—whether or not I’ve done anything to “deserve” it.

Fulfillment is human-connection, whether a brief glance of “Namaste” with a stranger, or a two-hour Skype conversation with a friend or loved-one (or anything in-between).

Fulfillment is watching the doubts-fears-uncertainties waft by, knowing they have no foothold.

Fulfillment is hearing the nay-saying (in my own head, or from the mouths of others), and knowing it has no power, knowing there is another voice cheering me on, guiding me, directing me, leading me, while being my biggest fan.

Fulfillment is knowing that LIFE is not my job or my income, not my family or relationships,  not the car I drive or the house I live in, not my health or my diet or my future.

Life itself is the essence of fulfillment; Life lives as me!

Life fills my bones and my marrow, fires my neurons, wiggles my toes, thinks my thoughts, feels my feelings, fills me up to overflowing with the essence of Source—the source of the universe, the cosmos, of all.

I just experience it all and enjoy the ride.

 

The Quality of Thought. A Journey of Fulfillment: Day 08

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

My motivation is my choice. My intention is my choice. My will is my choice.

In Peace, I listen within for guidance so that my actions are motivated by joy, my intentions are love, and my will is simply to share Joy and Love.

 

There are three really “big things” going on today through the guiding thought. The first one is acknowledging that I am “in control”, so to say. This isn’t saying that I can control things or people. No, it’s saying I can control myself. Behaviors and actions begin as motivation, intention, and will. By choosing in advance what motivates me, and the attitude with which I want to approach a life experience, my will is enacted to accomplish those results.

The second thing going on is recognizing that I have complete and total free will—I have choice, I make my choices, and I am the only one who makes my choices. That’s very liberating! But it also implies responsibility—I am the one responsible for my outcomes. Don’t like your outcomes? Change your mind! Do you want to emulate someone’s behavior? Do you have a role model you admire? Emulate their thoughts, mimic their mind!

(And, by the way, you will never “lose yourself” if you emulate or mimic someone else. The information you gain from someone else will only enhance and raise – assuming positivity – the quality of information you have already accumulated, which is totally unique.)

Continue to increase the quality of information that constitutes your thoughts and the quality of your outcomes will increase.

I choose and I have free will. These things imply that I can make poor choices. In the context of fulfillment this means things like disengagement, withholding, numb, disconnected, and uncaring. Because what fulfillment means is to be in tune with creativity, to be accepting and acceptable, and to attract all the wonderful experiences life can bring.

The third and final big thing in the guiding thought is that I have help/assistance in making better choices. “In peace I listen within for guidance”. “Guidance” implies it is possible to become lost. Guidance implies there are many choices, some better than others. Guidance implies I may not know my own best interest.

But there is a part of me who knows! And I can connect with that part in the peace and stillness of my own mind. That part of me will assist me toward the better choices and help me direct my mind to the fulfillment of Joy and Love.

Doing What Comes Naturally. A Journey of Fulfillment: Day 07

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

My joy unifies! Accepting my own joy, acknowledging it, sharing it, and expressing it heals me and others. To be wholly joyful means to be wholly love…means to be wholly my Self.

 

I’ve noticed that I’ve been in a better position to compare/contrast life experiences since beginning this journey. I have a better idea of what it means to be fulfilled: feeling expansive joy, feeling more ease, enjoying work, people, relationships, and feeling connected. Admittedly, I can’t claim to feel “whole love” or “wholeness” (but I am still working on it!). But what I do notice now is just…nice. I feel a sense of naturalness, of being able to relax with no tension.

I realized this because I had a contrasting experience.

I was in a situation that I’ve been in many times before, but this time the thought just popped into my head, this is unnatural. So I stopped…and felt…and wondered…and compared. Yeah, I feel isolated (unnatural); Yeah, I feel tense (unnatural); Yeah, I feel uncaring (unnatural).

I know I am a loving, caring, giving person, so to notice myself withdrawing and withholding was significant. But I was able to notice…and that is also significant. Unless I notice, I don’t know where to begin to make a change.

Truly, the deepest part of me wants to be joyful, wants to give and share that joy, wants everyone to know and to be and to have that joy. For a moment I really “got” this.

For a moment, the words, the ideas expanded in my chest, radiated from my mind, became solid and tangible…and I know this is true; this is right, this is who I am and what I want.

And so I plod on, deepening my understanding, broadening my awareness, knowing there is a part of me that knows—that gets it.

The guiding thoughts lead me on a journey to that part of me—the real part, the natural place, which truly is wholly joyful, wholly giving, wholly whole.

I do my best to keep up.

Still the Uncertainty. A Journey of Fulfillment: Day 06

Copyright Tam Black 2014 Designed for susanwithpearls.com
Copyright Tam Black 2014
Designed for susanwithpearls.com

Why would I choose to limit my Self? Or choose to limit my reality? All of reality is mine, and mine to give! In giving and sharing, my joy increases, expanding my Love, expanding Life!

 

Here we are at day 06…and uncertainty, doubt, and fear have shown up. They do, you know….show up. Fortunately, I’m familiar enough with these (and thankful that I am) that I was able to recognize them. They still threw me into a spin though.

The core thoughts were:

Uncertainty: “I don’t know what I am doing.” “What am I doing?”

Doubt: “This isn’t doing anything…” “I’m not doing anything…” “What good is this? Am I?”

Fear: “Nothing is changing!” “I don’t feel any different!” “I have to change; I have to do more, be more…”

>Shhhhhhhhhhhhh<

I am always thankful and relieved when I get to the other side of these thoughts, like voices in my head, goading, chiding, belittling me. But until I do, until I can just tell them to be quiet, “be still”, I feel worked up and spinning.

I fasted for day 06, ingesting only liquids, no solid foods. Fasting is one of the tools I use to get from one side of thoughts like these to the other side. It wasn’t actually intentional to fast because of my mind’s goading over-activity; I had planned to fast not knowing these emotions were going to show up. But I am glad it worked out like that. Fasting is a very “lifting” experience; it really helps to clear my mind and emotions…or maybe I am just too busy thinking about how hungry I am to pay much attention to my uncertainty, doubt, and fear. Sometimes contemplation only gets me so far, before it becomes part of the spinning itself. The mind can’t always control the mind. That’s where the physical practices come in really handy.

I still feel raw and exposed, and even still feel some uncertainty, but overlaying this is assurance: I am where I need to be and everything is okay.